Through the looking glass

February 21, 2012

What an absolutely gorgeous day.  Michael fixed coffee this morning and we sat outside listening to the birds chirping.  While we were out there, Mom called inviting us to the Mardi Gras party at Town Hall Estates.  Whenever there is a party, Mom is in the center of the festivities.  She LOVES having a good time.

We got dressed up and headed for the nursing home.  We were a few minutes later than what we had told Mom and she was in a dither and thought we had abandoned her.  After calming her down, we wheeled her on down to the party room.  Oh my goodness, they had masks, beads, balloons, horns and root beer floats for the residents.  They had brought in a lady with a karaoke machine and cleared the floor for dancing and singing.  She had a bit of a cold so Michael offered to help her out.  He has a wonderful deep baritone voice and really got things hopping.  Several of the patients got up to sing ... how fun for them to strut their stuff!  One lady tossed her walker aside, grabbed the hand of an aide and did a mean twist!!  Mom lasted about an hour and a half without her oxygen and we wheeled one tired lady back to her room.  She was all smiles and said it was one of her best times ever!!

Have you heard of the book, THE MAN IN THE MIRROR?  Well, I woke up this morning thinking about that book and the words, "through the looking glass" kept coming at me.  When that happens, I need to pay attention to my thoughts and meditate on what it means to me.

First of all, I thought about looking into a mirror.  If my friends and family were polled, what would they see?  Then, if I looked very closely at my heart would I see the same person?  I think there are psychological tests to determine that, aren't there?  I know that the healthier the person the closer the two views are.  But, then, who really knows???

"We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others, that in the end, we become disguised to ourselves."~~Francois de la Rochefoucauld

Change is difficult at best, and seeing ourselves in the naked truth quite painful.  I have so much respect for those who go through twelve steps and are able to do the tough stuff.  If our "self" depends on what others think of us, dare we expose ourselves and risk further abandonment?  That's a tough question, don't you think?  I enjoy talking to and reading about people who have walked through the fire of life and, although they carry scars, they have a smile on their faces and pep in their step.  They are the ones that reach out and touch lives.  I've been fortunate to have been a part of some classes and groups where it has been okay to be totally honest without fear of judgement.  If we are works in progress then that's all that counts.

I have been so gullible when it comes to people.  If someone tells me something I take it as truth because I am truthful.  I forget that there are people out there that take advantage of people like me.  I remember talking with my family physician many years ago about being duped by an entire family.  He explained to me that he had been taken in several times by manipulators and because they are so good at lying, they truly believe their own lies and can pass a lie detector test.  I've learned to be more aware.  That makes me sad but it is a sign of our times.

My mind has come full circle and I am smiling thinking about those folks at Town Hall Estates.  Life's not fair is it??  There are those there in their forties and fifties that have had strokes or other life altering issues.  Then, there are those who are in their nineties biding their time before they meet their maker.  It felt so good to watch them smile.  It takes so little to brighten their days -- Mom is fortunate to be in a good place where she is loved and cared for so tenderly.  Oh, she complains but that's okay too.  I might do the same if I were in her shoes.

All in all, it's been a wonderful day filled with love and laughter.  After we got home, mom called and said that a lady came up to her after we left and asked her who that man was that sang.  Mom stated proudly, "That was my son."  "Oh," the lady replied, "I was wanting to get his autograph."  Life can be quite simple, can't it and our kudos come from unexpected people for our random acts of kindness!!

Don't forget those elderly folks in your lives.  We'll be there one day hoping, just hoping, that someone will brighten our day with a visit, a phone call, or card.

Take gentle care, my friends, always knowing

that you are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!

Other things may change us, but we start and end with family."~~Anthony Brandt