Contentment ~ "God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame."

December 8, 2013

Dear Readers,

It's a gray, overcast wintry day in North Central Texas. I was hoping that the winter storm would begin to dissipate but it's still icy and quite chilly. I decided to enjoy a warm soak in the claw foot tub in the cottage, enjoy a fire in the fireplace, and hopefully will get out of the house this afternoon. Yay!

As I have continued to pray about contentment, it came to mind that many people see contentedness and happiness as one and the same. In many ways I guess they are but I've learned to be content even in times of unhappiness. Does that mean, I lay down and give in to my circumstance? Heck no, it doesn't. Unhappiness is just not going to steal the time I have left on this earth.

There are many ways to become happy ~ by doing "things" (in my case, decorating my Woman Cave aka the cottage, gardening, reading, antiquing, walking, writing, cooking, praying, spending time with family and friends...).  I find that when I am busy doing something that I am passionate about, I am not only happy but content as well.

When I moved away from the city, I had decided to simplify my life. Boy howdy did I ever!! For me, contentedness is at the core of simplification. It's been about me wanting less, having a simpler life rather than always wanting more, always acquiring more, and never being content. Believe me, it was tough giving things away, having garage sales, and continually paring down. Once I got rid of all the stuff that I had been acquiring, life became more manageable.

Now, I will not claim to never want things that catch my eye in an antique store or on my shopping excursions with my friend, Beverly, who is a shopaholic. But, while I am not immune to wants, I have learned to catch myself and to think about where it is going to go, where I am going to wear it, and my reasoning for my purchase. I am not content when surrounded by clutter.

There have been times that I have bought more than I could afford. I have to be very careful because I am a giver and love to find gifts for those I love that they would like. A couple weeks ago, my husband resigned his position as manager of the college bookstore. With Christmas just around the corner, we had to sit down and decide how much we could spend on each person. I am finding that I am struggling with my contentedness because I "want" to give more than I have. To be content in a time of financial downturn has been a challenge. A BIG one!

So often, it seems we are never happy with the significant people in our lives. They don't act the way we want them to ~ we pout, shout, pray and do whatever we can to make sure they conform to our expectations. Been there, done that too. I also found that I was never happy with myself and kept trying to be someone I wasn't. Man, it just didn't work. It just led to poor self esteem and a huge inferiority complex.

I know, I know, there are some folks who would say that my way of defining happiness and contentedness and a positive outlook on life are teaching people to accept abuse from others, social injustice, and not strive for change.  Absolutely not!  I've worked with battered women suffering from physical, emotional, and spiritual abuse and I've told them to stand up for themselves and get away from their tormentors. I've campaigned (not as a Republican or Democrat but as an Independent) for change in a society that has been warped. I am not afraid to speak my mind even if it is not the popular thing to do. Social change can still happen if you are content with yourself, with your life, but not content with oppression around you.

What I do when I'm not feeling my contented self:

(1) As I mentioned in my previous blog, I keep a gratitude journal. This morning, I was grateful for hot water, my beautiful claw foot tub, the bath oil that my daughter gave me that made the water steam with fragrance ... I was grateful for the fireplace which warmed the entire cottage ... I was grateful for the Sensational Six who lined the floor of the bathroom waiting for me to climb out of the tub ... I was grateful that I had beautiful, fluffy towels to dry off ... I was grateful for (the list went on and on)... My pages will be filled with good thoughts today.

(2) STOP and remind myself to be grateful for the good in the people around me. I remember how Christ died for me, a sinner, warts, bumps, and all. I know that God loves me just where I am. I always keep the porch light burning for strained relationships! 

(3) STOP and consider why I want something. Is it a need or a want?

(4) I take time to smell the roses and appreciate my life. I absolutely love my morning gratitude and prayer sessions.

(5) DO ~ show people I appreciate them. Give hugs, smile, spend time with them, thank them out loud, thank them publicly.

(6) SMILE ~ Look in the mirror and smile. Look at others and smile.

(7) LIVE SIMPLY ~ Learn to enjoy the simple things. Conversations and spending time with loved ones doesn't cost a thing. Watch a movie or play games. Walk on the beach. Ride a bike.

(8) LOVE THE LORD MY GOD remembering that he is my example, my buddy in life.

MOST IMPORTANTLY, REMEMBER:

"God's gifts put man's best dreams to shame." 

~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Miss Dottie

PS I am so grateful for my readers. Another year has nearly come to a close and, more than anything, I have been blessed with emails, FB messages, and phone calls from those who want to walk the road of life with me. As I shut my computer down, I will leave you with this bit of wisdom given by Epicurus: "Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for." Sleep tight friends!!