When God Closes A Door...

Good Morning, Readers!  Come on in and have a seat.  We're supposed to have another day above 100 degrees today so we'll chat in the comfort of air conditioning and the whirring of the ceiling fan.  People are starting to get a little grouchy around town.  I must admit that it sure would be nice to have a nice rainstorm to cool things down a bit.  I made my usual trip outside early this morning and futzed around in my garden.  I am at a point of frustration because I can't do what I wantI can't do what I want to do (move a lot of dirt!).


Michael, Nick, Zach

Michael just called me on his way to his last day of work.  He was feeling rather melancholy.  He's worked at CVS Caremark for 4+ years and, as a supervisor, has mentored some great people.  He will miss them, I am sure.  It's a scary prospect being nearly 65 and joining those out there looking for work.  He had one interview that he was hoping would turn into a job offer but so far ... no news.  It's difficult not to look forward and wonder what will happen when his severance runs out but that only hinders staying in the now and doing what can be done each day.  When worry takes the place of doing, we get into trouble.  You've heard that saying about having the deer in the headlights look .... I'm sure there will be many people today with that look.  Michael said his job today would be to encourage and lift those people up.  Good for him!



Great American Gals (Me, Row 2, 2nd from left)

Not so long ago, I was in Michael's place.  I had worked for Great American Insurance for 5+ years.  All of a sudden human resources showed up and told us that they had sold our division.  We were all in shock ... our division had gone through some tough times and we, as employees, had worked our butts off to bring it into a more positive light.  Good enough to make us interesting for the right buyer!  For a long while, I felt lost.  We were a small division and, as such, were like a family.  Going to work was a pleasure and being a part of a team was uplifting.  In a matter of seconds ... poof (!) it was all was gone...  It took me quite some time to find another position with another insurance company.  Sadly, that didn't work out and I decided to retire.  Work stress kicked my Fibromyalgia into high gear and I underwent several surgeries.  Now when I mention going back to work, my rheumatologist shakes his head.  It is very difficult for me not to be able to do my part in financially supporting my family.  I struggle with that daily feeling like I am letting them down.  To be really honest, I also miss my nice paycheck that I brought home every two weeks!  To have to watch every dime can be a challenge in and of itself.

Life is a series of seasons, each bringing forth it's own fruit and trials.  I look back and can truly say that I've lived to the fullest through each season taking sweet joy in the good and learning from the not so good.  I taught my children ... "When life deals you lemons, make lemonade."  I've lived with that philosophy as well.  When God closed the door, He also opened another using adversity to bring forth something wonderful.  When I married a physically and abusive man, I ran ... I also joined the Board of Directors to establish the first women's shelter in Collin County Texas.  I was on the speaker's forum encouraging and sharing my story with others.  When I went through a severe depression, I decided to take part in the Stephen's Ministry program through the Lutheran Church.  My first assignment was a woman going through trials with her teenage daughter resulting in a deep depression.   With every turn and event, God used my experiences in life for good.  I was just an instrument!

You see, life is about keeping a positive attitude and believing in the good of people and of life.  If we look so long at the closed door, we won't even notice the open window with the sun shining through.  One of my favorite books is HIND'S FEET ON HIGH PLACES  written by Hannah Hurnard.  My dear friend, Frances, gave me the book in April of 2008.  Thank you Frances, one more time!!  HINDS FEET IN HIGH PLACES is the story of Much-Afraid leaving the Valley of Fear that she had always known, embarking on a journey to become a new creation.  With each page read, I found myself cheering for her and seeing myself with each step she took.  If you haven't read it, please do.  It's an easy ready showing us that there are no obstacles which our Savior's love cannot overcome.  If we accept life, day by day, the actual conditions and tests permitted by God, and lay down of our own will and accepting His, we will find grief, pain all transformed into something precious!


My friend, Beverly, called and asked if I wanted. to go to Burleson with her Tuesday.  We agreed on a time to get together which included taking Sadie and Toby to a new groomer here.  The groomer did ok but guess we were just used to the precision cuts they got at Petsmart in McKinney.  Sadie is always an angel for the groomer but Toby gets a bit more spunky.  He does NOT like having his feet or face touched!  In order to be groomed they had to be up to date on their shots.  The receptionist called 380 Animal Hospital and, of course, both needed updates.  They got their shots and the groomer noticed bare spots and sores on Sadie's skin.  The vet gave her a good going over, took some scrapings, and gave her two shots.  She also got put on an antibiotic and he gave me some meds to give her IF the itching continued.  I almost died though when I walked up to pay and the vet and grooming bill was $409.  Sadie is happy and more like herself today which makes me happy!  She is laying beside me as I write and is snoring up a storm!!

There is a new store in town called The Fried Pie Place.  We stopped in to check out their selection and, I must say, those pies looked mighty good.  I bought an apple pie which made for a delicious mid afternoon snack!!  Think I'll be going back to try some other flavors.  I'd never heard of fried pies before I came to this area of Texas ... calories out of this world but they sure are yummy!


Even though I was tired last night, I stayed up to do some laundry.  I stood awhile in the door of the wash room remembering how it was about a year ago.  The wash room was just a bare bones room attached to the house.  It had make-shift shelves and spider webs were everywhere.  The dryer wasn't vented to the outside so the lint just blew out a hose.  Yikes!  It was serviceable that's just about it.  Lupe finished the room putting up wallboard and finishing the walls ... he even put crown molding up!  We moved the hot water heater from the kitchen to the laundry room and got a stacked washer and dryer.  Now, it is not only functional but pretty and clean as well.  I feel blessed.

I am going to do touch up painting today and then do some studying and reading:  Sarah Palin's book, AMERICA BY HEART; my Daily Walk Bible reading in Ecclesiastes; and, start my Beth Moore study of 90 Days With the Beloved Disciple John.  Friend Beverly will drop in for tea and an uplifting visit and I will make my way to the nursing home to visit Mom.  Looks like a fruitful day!!

May God bless and keep you as you make your way on this journey of life ... thanks for dropping in for a chat.  Talk with ya'll again soon ... always remember you are loved and prayed for!  YA YOU!!

THE LORD GOD MAKETH MY FEET LIKE HIND'S FEET, AND SETTETH ME UPON MINE HIGH PLACES ~~ REFERENCE PSALM 18:33 AND HABAKKUK 3:19

Motives

Hi Everyone!  Blogging is so much fun.  It allows my friends and family inside my head and my world.  I am wide awake tonight so figured I would chat with ya'll a bit.  I just took the dogren out for a last "go" and nearly got eaten alive by chiggers and mosquitoes.  Yikes!!  We made a quick trip of it!!

I am still thinking about the little cat I saw that was sick and starving.  I wondered if she smelled the dog food I put out each morning for Sadie and Toby.  I take their food out and work in the garden while they munch away.  Toby is my "Velcro" dog and won't eat unless I am close.  I decided I would check with my across the street neighbor, Beverly, to see what I could do.  She works with a group that saves animals and said that she has a humane trap if I see the cat again and want to try catch it.  She'd seen the cat as well and hadn't been able to snare it.  So sad...

It's quiet here.  I can hear the sound of the fountain through the dining room window.  The sound of water always soothes me.  I have often times decided to sleep in the guest room because the fountain is just outside the window and it keeps me in a sweet slumber all night.  I think if I were rich, I would build a small screened in gazebo so I could sleep outside.  Without screens, the mosquitoes would eat me alive (like tonight)!!  I have all these ideas ... just takes time and money.  I have the time ... maybe I can figure out a way to make my ideas possible!

I'm so excited.  I ordered a white wicker table and chairs from Pier One to set on the back patio.  It's supposed to be in tomorrow.  They don't deliver BUT the lady at the desk said she would bring the set to me as she had a van.  Now...that's customer service!  I love eating outside and look forward to getting the grill set up and having some barbecues.  My goal is to put up some lights and have a festive place for friends and family to gather.  I always have to have a project going!!  There's something about putting together a plan and seeing it to completion that is so rewarding.

I finished reading the book of Proverbs for the second time this week.  In Chapter 21:2 it says, "We can justify our every deed but God looks at our motives."  There's a lot of meat in that statement.  In the childhood trauma therapy I had I looked at "motives" a great deal.  I don't think that my parents meant to hurt my spirit.  That way of thinking has gone a long way in my healing.  "Hurt people hurt people."  Ever heard that quote?  I think that it's true.  My therapist said that people react two ways when they are hurt repeatedly ... (1) you hurt me and I will get you back and (2) you hurt me, it must be my fault.  People who feel that their abuse was their fault usually have an easier time in therapy because since it was their fault not someone else's, they want to change.  When blame is spewed out and it's always someone else's fault, change is quite difficult.  Hearts harden and vengeance becomes a way of life.  I am fortunate ... In my life, my motives have been good even when things haven't turned out right.  I have peace there...

There are evil people in this world and I've met some with some pretty black hearts.  Ever meet anyone who smiled as they dug a barb into you?  Ever met someone who was unable to forgive and who held grudges?  What do you do when confronted with an evil soul?  Proverbs has helped me in this arena ... the first thing I began to realize was that most times my hunches and premonitions are right when I met someone and that I need to trust my instincts.  I now run when someone gives me the creeps!!!  I can't go back but I can go forward...  Let the evil ones lie about me or try to rock my world in a negative way ... my Lord has my back and protects me.  I rest in that!

Michael was here at the casa for the weekend.  This is his last week at work.  He's feeling pretty frazzled about not having a job lined up and has been working diligently on his resume'.  I've been praying for him daily that God would bless him with a job that would enable him to support our family.  I fixed him some meals that were his favorites and tried to be a good listener.  He said that when he walked in the back door, he felt so peaceful.  This place has a way of doing that to people!  Now, the decision needs to be made of whether we should rent the house in McKinney or sell it.

Let me share a funny (?) story with you.  In 1994, my husband and I decided to rent the house we had built to a woman who owned a limousine company.  She had two small daughters and a nanny who lived with her.  Karen (not her real name) had money for the first and last month's rent as well has another $1,000 for the deposit.  She seemed very nice and her references checked out.  One night about midnight, we got a call from our former neighbor.  She said that the swat team was outside our house ... she said there were men in bullet proof vests swarming the neighborhood...  Good grief!  I called the police station and told them what had been reported.  They said that yes they were after the woman who lived in the residence.  Later, I talked with the head of the swat unit ... the sweet young lady who moved into our home was deep into the world of prostitution and drugs.  When we were allowed back into the house, we were so glad that it hadn't been damaged in the raid.  Karen, her children and the nanny had surrendered without a fight.  After that incident, we decided to sell the house and it was purchased by a couple who fell in love with the house and gardens in the back.  It was a good ending to what could have been a mess ... I'm still a bit gun shy about renters!  Hmmmm...

I talked with my daughter, Jane, this weekend.  Tim got home from Minnesota safety.  She and Katrina had written a welcome message to him on the driveway using chalk and they enjoyed a relaxing evening of the family being back together.  Granddaughter Madison will be going on a mission trip in July so she will remain in Minnesota until then.  They've had a wild ride this summer ... first deciding to move back to Minnesota then having a job pop up unexpectedly for Tim in Tampa.  Life is such an adventure!  We will be visiting them sometime this summer which, I know, will be really fun!!

My Aunt Helen's Celebration of Life Service will be held August 6th in my home town in Minnesota.  I have wanted to go back for a visit for such a long while and just decided that I was just going to go.  My cousins Nancy and Jim are hosting a lunch for us all at a resort.  Golly!  It will be so much fun to visit with cousins I haven't seen in 40+ years.  My brother and his wife have graciously offered me a place to stay.  It will be good to catch up with them as well.  I am trying to convince them to make a trip to Texas when the snow flies this upcoming Winter.  Since I haven't been at the past couple high school reunions, I am hoping to gather some friends for lunch or dinner.  There's something special about my high school friends ... good people!!  I still remember us all as young men and women ready to take on the world!!

Melchor was here to check on the leveling of the foundation.  One thing I have learned is that the Hispanic workers around here are really jacks of all trades.  I really need to take a crash course in Spanish.  Many of them can speak broken English but so much gets lost in the translation.  We are needing to have the back patio removed and new cement poured ... Melchor said he is now doing remodeling and cement work and gave me a bid.  Workers are hungry here and eager to work.  Problem is, sometimes they think they can do something when they really can't.  They all call me the nice little lady...  Is it because i am so trusting and gullible??  Probably...  I wish I had jobs for all of them in one way or another...  The older I get the more I want to help as many people as possible.

My allergies are giving me fits today.  My eyes are itchy and red, my nose is running and I look like I've been on a two day toot.  There's something in my garden that is causing me to be quite miserable!  Last year about this time, I got picked to be on a jury deciding the fate of a driver given a DUI.  I found out later that I was picked because my eyes were red.  Good move because when we were deliberating, I knew that red eyes didn't necessarily mean that he was inebriated.  We did find the man guilty but I've kicked myself because I was the last hold out and just didn't feel that he was guilty.  I finally gave in to peer pressure and changed my vote mainly because he had refused a blood test.  I talked with both attorneys after the case was over and both said that it was going to be a maybe yes and maybe no case.  If the man would have submitted to a blood test, they wouldn't have been having the trial as he really was telling the truth about the amount of alcohol he had consumed.  Pride went before a fall.  I learned something though -- next time, I need to follow my own convictions even though everyone else has a different view.

Life is full of stories and experiences.  You just never know what is going to happen around the corner.  I love to listen to older folks talk about their lives.  When I can get Mom S to talk about her childhood, I get a kick out of her stories.  Yesterday, she told me a story about throwing a salt shaker at her mother when she was eating watermelon.  The shaker cut her mother's forehead and, to this day, Mom is afraid to eat watermelon because it reminds her of a time when, as a little girl, she thought she had killed her mother.

I hope that my stories have reminded you of some of your own stories.  Take some time and share your stories with your family and friends.  It's been that kind of a day ... a lazy, hazy day of Summer ... a day to relax in the hammock, sip on some iced tea and listen to the sounds of the stories of life!!

HAVE A MOST WONDERFUL DAY ... RUN IN A SPRINKLER ... LAUGH TIL YOUR TUMMY HURTS AND LET SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU KNOW HOW VERY SPECIAL THEY ARE!!  TIL NEXT TIME, KNOW YOU ARE LOVED AND PRAYED FOR ... YA YOU!!

Proverbs of Wisdom

It's another sunny day in Central Texas!!  I was out at 6am to water my flowers and plant three Indian Hawthorns ... the birds were really singing up a storm and the sounds of morning were refreshing!!  It's going to be another hot day and I have planned projects to keep me inside as much as possible...

While I was outside, Sadie saw something behind one of the bushes.  I'm thinking skunk, snake ... I decided to walk over to see what the commotion was and I saw a gray tail.  There was a hiss, Sadie yelped and I saw a little cat tear round the corner of the shed.  I decided to see where it went.  I looked up in the "Y" of the tree and there sat the most pathetic little cat ... she was starving, coughing, and her eyes were almost matted shut.  It almost looked like someone had poured glue into her eyes.  I stood there looking at her and tears began to roll down my cheeks.  In a moment, she jumped down into the neighbor's backyard then up over the fence and was gone.  As an animal lover, I had the deepest sadness come over me and for that second in time, I felt the pain and fear this poor creature was enduring in the wild.  I walked back to my chair, sat down and called my beloved dogren to me.  I wished I could save all the animals who have been let loose or abused and knew that I couldn't.  All I can do, is take good care of Sadie and Toby and when I am able to catch a stray, take them to the animal shelter.  Readers ... please spay and neuter your pets and take responsibility for keeping them safe and healthy.




Mom S 6/27/2011

 Mom S had an appointment to see the eye doctor last week.  Her exam went well and the good news was that she doesn't have to go back for another three months.  The bad news was that she fell getting from the doctor's chair to her wheelchair.  She called me crying and very distraught over the ordeal.  I dropped what I was doing and ran over to the nursing home to investigate.  She was sitting in her wheelchair reading a book.  It's hard being a caregiver ... we're never sure whether Mom is exaggerating or if something really happened as she is reporting.  We feel it's our job as caregivers to check everything out to make sure she is being well cared for and is safe.  She did fall but not to the floor and had no sign of trauma to her legs, knees or feet.  I am wondering if she is having small strokes as she is quite confused when these things happen.  I ran into Clayton (works at the nursing home) today at the store and since he was there with her, he gave me a play by play accounting of what happened.  He put my mind at ease in many ways but there is always the worry that she will fall again no matter how closely she is watched and guarded.



A Finished Kitchen 6/2011

 There are times when I am at the little casa that I feel like I have always been here.  I prayed about the restoration of this house for a long while before committing.  The peace I had was overwhelming then and has continued each day since.  Retirement is not what I thought it would be nor is this where I thought I would reside.  Funny how that happens... We have dreams -- my dream has always been to live in a house by a lake with a broad front porch.  Family is so important to me and my dream also included my children and grandchildren mingling around ... laughter and love ... tears and sorrow ... togetherness.  That was my plan. It hasn't turned out that way yet it will always be my heart's desire.  BLOOM WHERE I AM PLANTED ... that has always been my motto and I am grateful to be where I am.  Life is too short always looking backwards and feeling sad for what didn't pan out.

I finished reading the book of Proverbs and decided to read it again since I am ahead of schedule on reading through the Bible in a year.  There is so much wisdom to be gained from each verse.  I read, think, then read again applying it to what I am going through in this season of life.  Today, our society is so absorbed with beauty .. beauty is everything.  I read in Proverbs 11:22 "A beautiful woman lacking discretion and modesty is like a fine gold ring in a pig's snout."  Think about that for a moment.  So many beautiful women are using their looks to trap men and get what they want in the workplace and everywhere else.  Take a look in just about any magazine or turn on the TV ... modesty?  What is that??  Giving?  What is that??  It's all about sex and sex sells.  When my daughter, Jane, was in eighth grade, she went to a manners class ... at the end of the class, the girls took part in a style show wearing a dress they picked out.  Are we even teaching manners anymore?  Our little girls are dressing like Lady Gaga and child stars who are role models run wild once they reach puberty.  God help us...


Oh the joy of Kat!

I did happen on this in Proverbs 16:31 "White hair is a crown of glory and is seen most among the godly."  I smiled ... did I read this right?  White hair is a crown of glory??  I have been wondering if I should head for the salon and color my hair back to brown then I thought ... God gave me this head of white hair, I will wear it proudly and feel blessed.  My Aunt Laura had beautiful white hair as did my mother.  People used to stop my mother on the street and compliment her on her beautiful hair.  I used to cut it for her and style it ... that was such a special time for us.  Her hair was so soft and it felt so good to shape it into curls that framed her lovely face.

My blog has taken a new turn.  Maybe it's because I am feeling quite mellow these days.  There is nothing I can control except my own actions and reactions to the people and world around me.  The rest?  Well, let's just say I am grateful for the blessings I have been graced with.

As for you, my Readers, I pray that life is treating you well and that joy has crept into every corner of your heart.  Enjoy each season of your life taking time to smell the proverbial roses!

"I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today."~~William Allen White

                                                      

An Ordinarily Special Day!

Good Afternoon, Readers!  It rained here last night.  Yea!  My flowers are lovin' the drink of water and I don't have to water today!!  The rain dance I did yesterday must have worked!!  I opened the back door this morning and drank in the fresh cool air.  It was such a treat to spend some time outside watching Sadie and Toby munch on their breakfast and then chase Mr. Squirrel.

I took an assessment of what I've done outside so far and plotted out another section of the lower garden.  I am rethinking where I planted a hedge and may move that.  Michael laughs at me ... I move plants like most people move furniture until I get them where they need to be.

Yesterday was one of those ordinary special days.  I was up extra early and decided to go have coffee with Mom at the nursing home.  The coffee there is pretty good and it's always nice to help her start her day and check to see if she needs anything.

After my time with Mom, I made my daily trip to Walmart to get more plants and groceries.  I like to make my way through the garden center to see what has been marked down and what is new.  I found some day lilies and ornamental grasses that looked interesting ... they also had a great bird bath at a discounted price.  I am also enjoying the fresh pineapple and strawberries that come in each day  ... I have a great recipe of mixing dark brown sugar with sour cream as a sauce for fresh fruit ... yummy!  Plants, groceries and a few other essentials in hand I made my way through the check out and headed home.

I'd done my rain dance hoping for rain and wanted to get my plants in the ground.  I was just finishing up and saw Beverly coming around the corner of the house.  She was dressed to the nines and wanted to know if I wanted to "do a little rat killin'" with her.  (That means doing errands around these parts of Texas!)  We went over to the Outlet Mall and, of course, found a few things that had our names written all over them.  We should have headed home but decided to stop at Arby's for a sandwich ... once we were refueled, we decided to head to Lake Whitney to check out the nurseries and antique shops.

Whitney is a quaint little town next to the lake that bears it's name.  The plant nurseries and shops were very inviting and I definitely want to go back again.  We met a man and woman who were doing statuary's in their retirement years along with running their small nursery.  Oh goodness ... they were out in the heat pouring cement and staining the statuary's.  It didn't seem to bother them that it was so darned hot ... Beverly and I were happy to escape to the coolness of the car and head for the antique shops that had air conditioning.  All in all, we had a great afternoon checking out new nooks and crannies.  Whitney is filled with great restaurants and we made a note to drive back over there on one of our lunch outings.

My silly ankle is still swollen and very black and blue.  I still have to keep an ace bandage on it.  I am told it will take awhile to be 100% ... patience ... patience!  I did throw away my Sketchers Shaper Tennis Shoes and got a new pair of walking tennies yesterday.  I couldn't tell that the shapers did any shaping and did add to a more wobbly gait.  I also found a cool pair of Rocket Dogs ... I may be 64 years old but I still enjoy fun shoes!!

Life can be rewarding in small town America.  The slower pace of living suits me just fine!  Planning is difficult for me as I never know how my Fibromyalgia is going to be...  It's another big adjustment for me because I am a planner who loves having everything plotted out in life.  I know my spontaneousness is hard on my family because living in the now is not always practical.  The good thing though about living in the now is that each day can bring special outings and times with family and friends.  I guess like just about everything ... life is what you make of it.  I wish my life were different but rather than stress out about it, I am learning to go with the flow and have a good day.  If I concentrate on disappointing myself and others when my bones and muscles scream, I end up thinking of my glass as half empty rather than half full.  Attitude ... it's all about attitude!

A blog is a type of journal ... one shared with others.  Yesterday was an ordinary day in my life but also one filled with fun adventures and family.  Michael had a job interview and is looking forward to round two of interviews with this particular company coming to Richardson, TX.  My son in law received a job offer from Colgate Palmolive in Florida and decided to accept it.  They were hoping to move back to Minnesota but God had other plans for them.  Tim is excited and feeling blessed with the package and Jane is feeling content and happy for Tim.  This ordinary day was been fraught with blessings all around and I rested my head on my pillow last night and smiled!



Nicholas's Ordinary Special Rock

 Ordinary days make for pleasant memories.  No extreme ups and downs ... just life being lived moment to moment.  I like those days and cherish them.  A few months ago, we were at my grandsons' baseball games and Nicholas picked up an ordinary rock.  His comment?  "This is the most beautiful rock in the whole world."  I tossed that rock in my purse and now it sits on the shelf in the bathroom.  Each time I look at it, I look at it through Nicholas's eyes.  Yes, Nicholas this is a special ordinary rock!

Today?  So far, it's another ordinary day ... the cable guy is here hooking up the TV in the guest room.  I have plans to go get a historic red paint to refurbish a cabinet for the kitchen and will tackle that later today.  The trash man commeth tomorrow so I need to gather up all the empty plant cans and tidy up the back patio.  Who knows what else will "happen" as the day goes by??

I've become interested in genealogy ... it's not difficult to get the names of those who form the list of my heritage.  The thing that I wonder about the most is their daily lives.  What did they do with their time and who were they as people?  I wish I had their journals of their ordinary days.  Those ordinary days and events say a lot!!

May today be one of those ordinary days for you ... one filled with smiles and good thoughts!!  You are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart."

~~Helen Keller 

In the Heat of the Day!



The gardens take shape at the little casa!

Good Evening, Readers!  I'm outside in the lower garden doing my blog ... aren't lap top computers great?  Michael brought me two turquoise Adirondack chairs this past weekend.  I am thoroughly enjoying my time outdoors writing, reading, having that first cup of coffee, and listening to the sound of the fountain.  Sunday it was 111 degrees here.  Now, that's hot!  To top it off, we also had wind gusts of 20+ miles an hour.  To go from the car into the store felt like walking against a blow dryer.  We are supposed to get some rain mid week.  I sure hope so.  I'd like a break from watering my plants!


My new chair is sooo comfy!

I am so grateful that the little casa has central air conditioning.  When we remodeled the house, we put in extra insulation.  I can now set the temperature at 80 and turn on the ceiling fans and it's very comfortable.  My day starts about 6am outdoors ... around noon I am ready to go inside and tackle my projects.  It's not unusual though for me to be outside again around 7 pm.  This weekend, I got more plants to work into my lower garden..  I've decided that I need to do the stone work even if it takes me the rest of the summer.  My goal is to finish the lower garden by the end of July.  Since I am down here most of the time, I am thinking that Michael needs to move my wicker patio furniture down here.  There is so much to do outside ... it's almost overwhelming!  Nothing had been done inside or outside with the house in many a year. 

I went to church this morning with Mom S.  She loves to get all dolled up for Monday morning services at the nursing home.  Her long time friend, Doris joined us and we sat in our usual places.  Sometimes they have a preacher but often times it's just someone who gives an hour long devotional.  Mom wanted me to have lunch with her but I took a rain check.  Being a caregiver certainly has it's challenges.  The nurse told Mom that she could go without her oxygen to the activities at the centre and Mom took that to mean that she didn't need her oxygen any longer.  She almost threw a temper tantrum when I asked her to put the oxygen back on.  Michael called the nurse and asked her to take her oxygen levels and yes they were in the 80's...  He was able to lay down the law in a way that she agreed to keep the oxygen on.  She pouted for awhile but hopefully, she will abide by the rules!

In the heat of the day ... my Fibromyalgia rears it's ugly head.  My rheumatologist tells me that with each surgery and trauma the fibro often gets worse.  I think I agree with him.  I have days that I feel really good and some when I feel like every inch of my body has been beaten with a baseball bat.  The heat mid day seems to take the sap out of my being.  I am not a nap person but have found myself barely able to keep my eyes open.  My friend, Beverly, has given me a British mystery to read and I haven't been able to make it past page 1.


Beverly 6/20/2011

 In the heat of the day ...  I enjoy a cool drink and conversation with my new friend, Beverly.  She has inspired me to start being more fashionable in my dress and appearance.  Left to my own devices, I prefer clothes that are loose and comfortable.  I've never been a clothes person and shopping for them has always been a chore.  A couple weeks ago, we went shopping and I tried on some things I would normally pass by.  I purchased a full length mirror and am putting forth the effort to get up, dress up, put my make-up on and do my hair.  Beverly is tall and always looks so put together ... she's been good for me!  She's also a naturalist gardener and an amazing cook ... she keeps me learning and growing!!


Dottie's den...

 In the heat of the day ... I enjoy teaching Beverly about staging her house and interior design.  She says that I have encouraged her to be more mindful about "what best goes where."  She says I take homemaking to a higher level than she is used to.  We have different interests and talents and have become better people for having known each other!

In the heat of the day ... I like to continue in my Daily Walk Bible readings.  There's something about reading the word of God (often times out loud) that centers me and gives me a peace.  Funny...I don't fall asleep when I am focused on the passages before me.  I am now into Proverbs ... wisdom at it's best 

In the heat of the day ... I like to wool gather.  I always have a project going and it's very difficult for me to sit still for very long.  On the days that my body tells me "no" I can think about the good days and what I am going to accomplish.  It helps me to focus on the positive and what I can do rather than on the negative and what I can't do.  No day comes and goes without being fruitful!!

Sometimes I hear people say, "I'm bored."  I even say that myself sometimes when I am having to rest.  To get myself out of "myself," I concentrate on what I can do for others.  I can write a card or two while I am couch bound ... I can grab my lap top and write a blog ... I can concentrate on doing something for someone else and, guess what?  My boredom quickly goes away.  No one can take my smile ... my heart ... my love of my fellow man.

The mosquitos, ants and chiggers are out and it's time for me to go indoors and call it a day.  What do you do in the heat of the day?  We can all do something ... the heat of Summer is similar to the cold of Winter ... it's a time when things slow down and we have to find something out of the ordinary to keep us busy.  I pray that you will find your time filled with fruitfulness.

May your days of Summer be filled with joy and fruitfulness!  Always remember you are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!

I'll be here tomorrow ... same time!!

 







   










      

New Eyes To See

Phew!  It's hot here in Texas!  Our weather went from cool to HOT ... never mind the inbetween stuff.  We've had several days of over 100 degree weather with a hot wind...  I think I need to put on my rain dance outfit and howl at the moon.  We have huge cracks in the ground ... I'm afraid that I will loose Toby in one of them!!  We need to either make a decision to go with one of the landscapers or try to plant bushes, flowers and lay sod ourselves.  Ought to be interesting!

I got up extra early this morning to feed my plants and water them.  I need to do some weeding ... since I have to be here for the cable guy tomorrow I will put that on my early am agenda!  Now I know why the old settlers here got up at dawn to work during the summer and took a siesta at noon.  Mornings and evenings are bearable ... the noon day heat?  Not so much!!

Since I was here at the little casa, I wasn't able to attend the parade for the Dallas Mavericks.  I did watch it on TV.  It was so fun to watch the fans and all those participating.  Mark Cuban paid for the parade and, I must say, he didn't spare any expense.  At last count there were over 250,000 fans that lined the streets.Texans have been noted for doing things "big." I got such a kick out of all the fanfare.

Yesterday I posted a photo of my father on Facebook in honor of Father's Day.  I sat and looked at the photo for a very long time ... I wondered how different his life (and mine) would have been had he not been in the thick of the major battles of World War II.  I remembered his kindnesses towards his family, my mother, and the lessons in life that he taught me.  I don't know how much counseling our men serving in the armed services get when they leave combat zones now but I hope it's a whole lot more than our soldiers serving in World War II.  I am proud of my father and the sacrifices that he made to protect and serve our country.  I am also proud of my father for the sacrifices he made to provide for my mother, brother, and I.  He was creative, bright and dedicated to causes he believed in.  He didn't talk much about the Lord other than to say that he did pray.  He kept his thoughts to himself and busied himself from morning til night.  When my daughter, Jill, was born he was so excited.  He absolutely adored her ... when, my second daughter, Jane, was born he was the first to arrive to celebrate her birth.  Had he lived beyond 55, I am sure he would have been a great grandfather to all three of my children.  It has been cleansing for me to lance the wounds and scars left from my childhood and to truly understand him as a man and as a father.  I will be so excited to wrap my arms around him in Heaven and tell him that I love him.  Happy Father's Day, Dad!!

I visited with Mom S yesterday and she was thinking that she needed some new decorator items for her shelves and also a couple new sweat suits (yes, you read that right ... sweat suits!).  I guess because she doesn't move around much she gets cold easily.  I was sitting on her bed chatting with her and felt drenched in sweat!  Not sure that I can find winter clothes in July!  I'll try though...  She doesn't ask for much and I enjoy seeing her smile.  I did make a quick trip to Waco this afternoon and got her some summer goodies for her shelf as well as a couple little American flags.  She will be excited tomorrow when I arrive with my packages in hand!

I had a post op appointment to have my eyes checked after my cataract surgery last Tuesday.  Everything is going great and with each new day I marvel at the skills of accomplished surgeons.  Gosh, I'd be a mess without their expertise!  For 10 days before my cataract surgery I had to go without my contacts and was blind as a bat.  I had some readers but goodness what a struggle ... I had several pair of glasses but gradually I would misplace them ending up with no glasses by the end of the day.  I'd start searching so that I could at least start the new day with a fresh stack.  I found out right quick what eye strain was!!  Now, I can see to drive at night and the richness of the colors around me are brilliant!!


After my eye appointment, I headed back to the little casa.  It's an hour and a half drive from North Texas ... I've learned to set my speedometer and enjoy the ride...  Toby sleeps and I listen to talk radio and catch up on the latest hot topics...  I get a kick out of how some folks can really get their knickers in a knot about what they believe in.  I try to be very open minded and listen to all sides before stepping in with my own opinion ... I lean towards the very conservative Christian side which can tick some liberals off.  I've just learned that I have never gotten into trouble doing "it" God's way ... I march to the tune of my own drum BUT my drum has been in rhythm with the Lord most of my life ... He gave me a mind to think and free will to act ... He also planted that seed of a desire for "wisdom" in my heart and He's the foundation I have built my life on.

New Eyes to See ... my old eyes were growing tired and my vision wasn't as sharp as it should be.  Night driving was impossible as was reading without bright lights.  When I had the cataract removed from my left eye, I was a little scared.  The doctor gave me mono vision so my left eye would be used to read and the right for distant vision.  When my right eye was done, things began to clear and, oh my goodness, I could see perfectly!!  The whole ordeal reminded me of when I became a Christian ... I began to see everything differently.  It may sound weird but I began to see with my heart not just my mind.  I became more accepting of myself and of others knowing that perfection is impossible.  My heart became aligned with God's and I knew that I would never be the same old person nor would I ever see through old eyes.  I am one grateful lady!!

I so enjoy my time here at the little casa.  Today, I found my way to the post office ... no lines ... just a little building with one person tending shop.  I was in and out in a matter of minutes!  From there I made my way to the local grocery store.  Actually, it was pretty nice ... a welcome change from Walmart!

The couple next door are getting ready for baby number two to arrive.  They've been converting their one car garage to another room.  I hear sawing and hammering as they make progress.  Little Valentina was so excited last night as they were bringing in new little girl furniture.  Senora Lucy lives with them and although she doesn't speak much English her smile is so warming and we wave throughout the day.  Mama, Daddy, Valentina, and Senora Lucy all live in a two bedroom house without central heat and air.  They are a quiet family but laughter errupts often as they gather outside to grill and play with Valentina.  I am learning a lot from them.

It is time to sign off and do a little reading before I close my eyes.  I hope that you, my readers, have had a great day.  We will chat tomorrow and I will share my walk with you...  Until then, be safe and be joyous ... fill your life with the goodness of family and friends and be greatful for what you have whether in feast or famine!

"But I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep.”~~Robert Frost

     

A Cry for Cleansing

Good Afternoon from the little casa in central Texas.  When, the alarm went off at 6:30 this morning, I jumped out of bed looking forward to my new day.  Friend, Beverly, is NOT a morning person and was still in her nightgown when I rapped on her door for a cup of coffee.  We had decided to try walking early this morning to get a jump on the expected 90+ degree heat coming our way ... oh, I know, my ankle is still healing but I do need to get a little exercise to prevent blood clots ... or so I tell myself!

I am in shock at the number of beautiful old homes here that are surrounded by colorful gardens.  Dead end streets often mean hidden beauty.  I am glad that Beverly is an explorer like me and is willing to check out the nooks and crannies of the city.  It makes me wonder even more why the city is dying because there are people who live here of all socio-economic statuses.  I don't know why people fear progress and change ... without it, towns, cities, and, yes, people become stagnant and die.

Nina has the kitchen walls looking good.  I had a hard time deciding between a brown background paper and a red background paper.  I took the safe route with the brown and it looks very put together and chic BUT I think the red would have gotten my cooking spirits reved up more!  We'll see if this grows on me.  Nina is such a perfectionist – I think that’s why she has such a great reputation for doing faux finishes and papering.  She’s in high demand and now that wallpaper is making a comeback, she’ll be even more busy.  She'd probably kill me if I changed paper ... she had a dickens of a time with all the little corners in the crown molding of the cabinets.  I just love all the people who have helped us create such a warm, inviting place to retreat to!

Sadie stayed behind with Michael on this trip.  She is allergic to something in the dirt at the little casa (probably chiggers!) and she scratches herself silly.  Toby is more of an "on my heels" kind of dog so whatever it is that bothers Sadie doesn't phase him.  Beverly did a good job of watering while I was gone so what I have planted seems to be doing ok.  I had an arborist come out to check the Elm tree in the backyard.  We were afraid that it was dying but he said that it was fine ... it just needed some serious trimming.  I think we can handle that.  It is such an overwhelmingly beautiful tree that I'm excited that it will be a centerpiece of the lower garden!  I get so excited about my gardens ... it wasn't until in the early 1990's that I developed a desire for all things green and colorful outdoors.  Fortunately, I've had some good mentors!

Each new day here brings more adventures ... I miss it when I go back to the city although the shopping is sure a lot better there!  Here, I think I could cover every store in one day!  Michael's father used to go to Walmart at least once a day ... the joke was he always bought paper towels and over time amassed quite a stash!  Now, I find myself doing the same thing ... there is always something I seem to "need."   I am trying to convince Beverly that we need to make a trip to Cleburne today to check out the antique stores there.  Her husband, Don, just shakes his head and says, "Be safe" as we back out the driveway to head to our destinations.

On Monday, I mentioned the uncovering of Congressman Weiner's sin.  We can sit in judgement but oh how we need to realize how sin starts with just a simple thought, a peek, an innocent email, a Facebook acquaintance...  I just reread Psalm 51 which was written by David during the darkest hours of his life.  For so many years, he had been the shepherd-king and had ruled righteously.  Overnight, his sin with Bathsheba changed all that … first an innocent peek, then adultery, then murder stained the king’s life.  Nathan the prophet was sent by God to confront David of the severity of his sin.  How did David respond?  David responded with a heartfelt plea for forgiveness ... no justification or defensiveness or cover up. 

As King David bowed in humble repentance and confession, he professed his broken spirit and remorse.  As a Lutheran, we repeated these verses nearly every Sunday … “Create in me a clean hear O God, filled with clean thoughts and right desires.  Don’t toss me aside, banished forever from your presence.  Don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.  Restore to me the joy of thy salvation and make me willing to obey you.”  ~~Psalm 51:10-12  I’ve repeated them many times over the years in my prayer closet as I’ve bared my soul to my maker.  These words gave me peace growing up and they do now as well.

David goes on to say, “You don’t want penance; if you did, how gladly I would do it!  You aren’t interested in offerings burned before you on the altar.  It is a broken spirit you want – remorse and penitence.  A broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not ignore.” (v 16-17)  The 51^st Psalm ends with this verse, “And when my heart is right, then you will rejoice in the good that I do…”  The Bible is full of "ifs" followed by "thens".  I don't know about you, but my heart has to be right before my work and my life overflows with God's blessings.  Just like David and Anthony Weiner, we need to remember that sin begins with that slight slip and with that slight slip comes shame and the harboring of secrets. 

I will leave you with this thought ... forgiveness from others is charity; forgiveness from God is grace; and, forgiving ourselves is wisdom.  Until we chat again, I pray blessings upon you and yours!  Carpe' Diem!!

 

Blog Thoughts

Good Morning Readers from my back porch in North Texas!!  I was up early with the dogren and decided to water my plants and take stock of my gardens.  Hubby has been gracious to water via sprinkler while I am at the little casa.  I appreciate his efforts but he doesn't have the interest that I do in each pot and plant.  All in all, things are gloriously beautiful and I will forgo pots in the gardens for the time being.

Last night the Dallas Mavericks beat the Miami Heat in a nail biting game.  I am looking forward to the parade welcoming the team home.  Last night, the streets were filled with revelers and there was so much excitement in the air.  We watched the game on TV but I was wishing that we were in the thick of things and sharing the joy of the NBA trophy with all the fans.  I much prefer being present and a part of the crowd rather than just sitting at home...  There's something about the energy of positive people that recharges me!  My arm chair husband kept telling me to quiet down as I watched the game ...  Hey, I love to cheer on my favorite team!!

There are whispers of Texas Governor Perry running for president.  He's been a great governor for Texas ... one who has stood up for his beliefs and often taken the heat for that.  Texas is a pretty independent state ... one that has withstood the downturn of the economy in ways that other states haven't.  Our home values are on the way up after a few years of staying the same and jobs are becoming more readily available.  There have always been a good supply of jobs ... the downside has been the decline in wages.  It's been a time of people banding together and tightening the belt and that's not bad.


Historic Library

The city that is home to the little casa has had a tough go the past ten years.  Home prices are ridiculously low which has caused it to become more of a bedroom community.  It's offered me a new way of thinking and living in a good way.  I've met some pretty awesome folks there who have befriended me in my downtime with my ankle sprain.  I've always been the giver in relationships and it's humbled me to become the receiver.  At a time when I've felt overcome with frustration, there has been Beverly, Don, Brenda, David, Betty, Debbie, Michael, Jeanette, Jane, and Mom S who have made my life filled with new forward thinking joy.



Master Bedroom 6/13/2011



Master Bedroom 6/13/2010


Speaking of the little casa ... what a difference a year makes!  The inside has been completed and now the work begins on the outside.  The backyard is quite large and, other than trees, is a blank slate.  It's been a frustration not to be able to lift the heavy stones and plants and shovel the truckloads of dirt and mulch needed to complete the gardens.  I laugh, my friend Beverly has promised to help me shovel and plant but she has a bad back ... I think she is a much better backyard coffee drinking partner!!  We are also thinking of making the garage into a guest house.  Right now, I look at it and shake my head ... Lupe assures me, it would be a beautiful little cottage.  We'll see what the next couple months bring...

Michael's position at CVS Caremark will end on June 30.  He's not looking forward to job hunting but for now, it's a necessity.  He has an important job interview on the 20th and we have our fingers (and toes) crossed that it will pan out.  He's a great manager and motivator of people... I pray for a successful job hunt for him!


Yesterday, son, Tommy and his family stopped by after church for lunch and a visit.  It was so good to see them.  Tommy works as a loan officer in the mortgage industry and has had to weather some pretty tough times the past year.  He's focused on doing the "right" thing having faith that the "right" people will notice.  He started a new job last year and has been promoted twice ... last week to a hand picked group of four to test a new marketing plan.  He's excited and I'm excited for him.  I just know that God will bless his integrity, hard work, and commitment to above and beyond excellent customer service.

My walk through the Bible has continued and gives me such a sense of peace.  I completed the book of Psalms this morning.  I received my Daily Walk Bible for my birthday in 1988 from my then boss and his wife, Bill and Ivey ... each year I say a special prayer for them in thanksgiving for his book.  The Lord and I have walked a long way together since 1988 ... the notes I've written in the margins reflect the miles of ups and downs, joys and sorrows that have marked my journey.  Psalm 71:17-21  "Oh God, you have helped me from my earliest childhood -- and, I have constantly testified to others of the wonderful things you do.  And now that I am old and gray, don't forsake me.  Give me time to tell this new generation (and their children too) about all your mighty miracles.  Your power and goodness, Lord reach to the highest heavens.  You have done such wonderful things.  Where is there another God like you?  You have let me sink down deep in desperate problems.  But you will bring me back to life again, up from the depth f the earth.  You will give me greater honor than before, and turn again and comfort me."  Ah, yes, what peace this gives me and such joy it brings looking back then moving forward!!

It feels good to be back in the "blog" saddle again.  I am reminded by the news of US Representative Anthony Weiner's secretive offenses that God knows the darkness in the corner's of of our lives and minds.  As humans we are sinners humbled by our choices we think no one will uncover.  Somehow, that just isn't true.  I've found that it's better to be transparent and own my mistakes.  Sometimes, I've been forgiven and sometimes not ... at least I don't have to worry about what someone is going to say about me and I sleep well at night.  Through long talks and my blog, my children, grandchildren and the world, in general, have come to know me ... the real me.  I've failed at so many things and have been humbled by the uncovering of my poor choices.  I've disobeyed my Father in Heaven and have felt the consequences burn through me.  His grace has made me love Him and want to be more like Him.  My frailties have made me "me" and time has mellowed and softened my rough edges.  I have learned that our children follow in our footsteps more easily than they follow our advice ... It is my hope that when they do fall, they will be able to own their own mistakes, learn from them then get up in faith and move forward.  Don't you know our Lord Jesus jumps up and down when we take on the full armor of God sharing our stories and lives with others.  "I can do all things through Christ"  and you can too!!!

My new eyes are working perfectly and I am so grateful!  I just marvel at how bright the colors of life are around me.  Last night I took a walk down memory lane from 1966 on to the present.  That's looking at a lot of photos!!  It was so neat having the photos jog my memory and I began to realize how much good has been woven through the crazy times of my life.  I began to think of the old Frank Sinatra song, "I Did It My Way" ... yes, I have regrets but then... I think that my life has stood for something bigger than myself.  It is in those times that I know I made a difference and isn't that what life is all about?  Just like my family before me ... something good came from my being here on earth ... and, I'm not done yet!!!  Listen to the song ... can you relate?



Stephanie 2nd from Right

It's wonderful to have a gifted actress in the family.  Michael and I enjoyed watching daughter Stephanie in the play You Can't Take It With You last Saturday night.  Stephanie did a great job of portraying the character of Essie, a long time hopeful (but quite untalented) ballerina.  There was joy and laughter in the play which debuted in 1936 ... I found there to be something universal in its message that has spoken to audiences over the years ... it's about being able to look within one's family for guidance, love, acceptance and happiness.  It's also about looking within one's self to find personal joy.  I found myself listening to the advice Grandpa gave his family and finding it pretty apropos for today!  What a fun evening!

I have miles to go before I sleep today ... Lily has had her bath and she is filled with gas ready to make the trip back to the little casa tomorrow.  I am going through the house shopping for decorator items that will fill empty spots at the casa.  I am wondering if  a couple comfy wicker chairs will fit in the backseat ... I miss being able to sit outdoors in the early morning to sip on my coffee.  One thing I noticed about me in looking at old photos ... I sure have repurposed a lot of decorator items in many different spots and homes!  I only buy what I love 'cause it's with me A LONG TIME!!

Today is such a beautiful day ... I hope that you are enjoying your day as much as I am!  Always remember how very much you are loved and prayed for!!

Now...seize this day with gusto!!!