Only live with what you love...

July 23, 2012

It's going to be another scorcher in North Central Texas today!  I am so grateful for air conditioning and breezes coming from the trees around us.  Temperatures topped 112 degrees yesterday.  Yikes!  That's unusual even for Texas!  From what I gather, other states are experiencing the same heat wave.  Fall will come soon ... my favorite time of the year!

The cottage is taking shape...

In the process of moving to the little casa last March and then working on the casita, I have learned some very valuable lessons.  The biggest one is:  only live with what you love.  As I have pared out and down, I have had to part with "things."  Seems rather odd, we spend our lives accumulating "things" then we spend the later part of our lives parting with "things."  If that is true, why do we accumulate in the first place?  Human nature, I guess.  We think what we collect is going to be of value to our loved ones but, in reality, is it?  I have some items that belonged to my great grandmother, Emma Jane; my grandmother, Belle; and, my mother, Olive.  What I wish I had was a written diary of their lives.  Who were they, really?  I wish my father would have written about the things that tormented him and I wish that my mother would have shared openly with me.  Emma Jane, a teacher, was a pioneer ... Belle a farmer's wife ... and, my mother was a daughter, aunt, mother, wife, Case Aide and a myriad of other things.  As I touch what belonged to them, I wonder...  Their genes run through me ... am I like them?

This chair has had many homes...

I am now working on the decor of the main area of the casita.  Things I thought would work didn't and things that I just knew wouldn't did.  The backdrop of the White Dove paint hasn't had to grow on me ... it is beautiful!  The soft green paint on the boards on the floor resonate serenity.  I love to walk barefoot and feel the imperfectness of the boards.  This morning, Toby and I laid on the sofa looking up at the ceiling.  There was so much to see ...  I thought, "if ceilings could only talk!"

I must admit I have been robbing some areas in the little casa to fill the casita.  I took the french chair in the office/guest room out to place beside the fireplace.  My friend, Melissa, had given me a crocheted lace tablecloth that I draped over it's back and arm.  Ah yes, good memories!  The painting above the fireplace - another reminder of her friendship.  I had Michael and Don go to the storage unit and retrieve the wing back chair that I've had for so many years.  At first glance, I thought it was too big but then, I thought, "this is my chair that I've loved to curl up in and read, it must stay."  My friend, Beverly, offered to buy the chair but, I don't know ... I just couldn't say, "Sold!"

My son used to say, "If Mom has a ledge, a corner, or a table, she will decorate it."  That WAS true.  Now, I am finding that I like simple without clutter.  My goal has been to have nothing under the beds and some drawers without anything in them!  I brought over a 4 drawer chest from storage yesterday to replace the small stand I took out to the casita to put in the bathroom.  Once I did that I decided to deep clean, touch up paint, and pare out things in the guest room/office.  I must admit, it felt so good!

It may take me awhile to finish decorating the main room of the cottage.  It's just too hot to go over to the storage unit and go though boxes.  I am hoping that we will have some cooler days before too long.  Until then, I won't worry about the empty spaces ... I only live with what I love!

As you walk through your home, do you smile ... remembering fondly?  Or, do you sigh wishing that you had the heart to get rid of stuff that is just taking up space??  When it comes right down to it, our homes and spaces are reflections of who we are ... as individuals and as families.

This is my motto for today:  Make your space beautiful, fun, and full of LOVE!!!!  Always put something totally unexpected in a place that can make you smile...  Joy can be found in the smallest of things!!  (Or, in my case, sometimes large -- my wooden indian Wimowee stands pretty tall - lol!)

God bless you real good this day and always ... your friend, Miss Dottie, is sending you love and prayers!

My pearls of wisdom for today...

Family - For Better or Worse ... let's:

always be honest,

count our blessings,

bear each other's burdens,

forgive and forget,

be kind and tender hearted,

comfort one another,

keep our promises,

be supportive of one another,

be true to each other,

look after each other,

treat each other like you treat friends,

But, most important, LOVE ONE ANOTHER

remembering the one who first loved us warts, bumps, and all!!

Maddy Belle takes Texas by storm!

Maddy Belle 7/29/2012

July 30, 2012


In case you haven't noticed in my blogs, I love my grandchildren aged 15, 9, 8, and 6.  I can't get enough of entering into their lives as they are growing up into their big adult bodies.  There are times when I am jealous of them.  I realize that so many times I was rushed through life wishing I was grown up.


My fifteen year old granddaughter made her way from Tampa, Florida to Dallas, Texas to spend a couple weeks with me.  She's always lived a long distance from me so this is a first...  It is different having her here rather than me going to visit her and her family.  After a few days of excitement and formalities, we are down to really getting to know one another.  Our little town in Central Texas may never be the same!!

Miss Dottie Belle 1964

I remember what it was like being a teenager in the 1960's and what it was like raising three teenagers in the 1980's and 1990's.  Looking back, being a teenager in Glenwood, Minnesota was quite simple compared to now.  I was lucky to have a group of close friends, a smaller group of even closer friends, and a very best friend.  Secrets?  No such thing ... everyone in town knew everything about everyone.  There were party lines -- I giggle now thinking how many people loved to pick up their phones just to get the newest gossip.  The closest thing to privacy was my diary where I could pen my thoughts.  I hid my books under my mattress hoping they wouldn't be discovered and read aloud at the dinner table!  That did happen a time or two!!

Madison 6/2012

I grabbed Madison by the hand late this morning and led her to the couch for a chat -- I was hoping that she would enlighten me me about today's teenagers. Do teenagers still get up at the crack of dawn to make sure hair is just so before going off to school?  Do they still have fights with their parents while struggling to find themselves and dream of going off to college.  I wasn't disappointed.  I think I was able to gain some insight into her fascinating world remembering more vividly what it was like for me back then.  Times change, teenaged feelings and struggles don't...

As a grandparent, my purpose is not to be a substitute parent.  I asked my daughter what the rules were for the visit.   She said, "Your rules..."  Oh, oh...  In some ways, I probably am more strict ... in other ways, much more lenient.  I'm pretty much a free spirited lady -- on the flip side, I have definite moral and ethical convictions.  I just love watching my grandchildren spread their wings and discover what their passions are.  Madison wants another piercing on her ear -- I wish I could say yes.  She wants a small tattoo on her shoulder -- I wish we could both get  one.  Don't worry, Jane and Tim, I am holding myself back (giggle).  I have issues with the skin tight jeans and shorts and shirts that don't cover the belly.  Somehow, I think ladies are more alluring with more clothes on than off.  I am sure Madison and I will come to a meeting of the minds -- we're going out this afternoon to do a little shopping.  I wonder if Dress Barn will have anything that appeals to a 15 year old!!

Nutella Brownies are yummy!
Chef Maddy at work!!

I had to admit to Madison that I really didn't know her nor did she know me.  We agreed that we had to start somewhere and decided that respect was important so that's where we began.  We laughed, cried, and, in the end, decided that we had something good going on.  I was able to share some snippits of my journey of life and she shared some of hers.  Don't you just love it when people are real?  We declared no topics off limits but set some boundaries.  We did a pinky shake and promised to be there for each other today and always.  It was a moment I will treasure as long as I live!

Our pasts can either make us better or bitter.  I never heard my mother and father say they loved me -- rather than allow my pain to fester, I made a conscious decision to tell my children and grandchildren that I love them at every available opportunity.  I value them; I love them unconditionally; and, am their most ardent cheerleader.  I was far from being the perfect parent nor am I a perfect grandparent.  I screw up and hope that my apologies are accepted when I say I miss the mark.  Sometimes they are, sometimes not...  Either way, I keep on doing my best, hoping the successes outweigh the oops!

I am so glad I have become comfortable in my own skin.  Likewise, I am so glad that I have had the opportunity to be a parent and a grandparent.  It has been important to me to prune out some of the crud from my family of origin and graft on new branches.  Golly gee ... my family tree gets prettier and prettier!  More than ever, I believe in Family - for better or worse!

Relationships take work, lots of grace, and a willingness to grow separately together.  Remember the old saying, "Children should be seen not heard?"  Well, that's not true.  I learn so much from my children and grandchildren.  I want to hear them ... I want to know what is whirling around in their minds and being deposited into their hearts.  I can't relive the past nor do I want to.  I'm having too much fun living in the present and looking forward to the future.  How about you??

Miss Dottie

PS  Maddy loves the little cottage!  She took the first bath in the claw foot tub and reported ... "It was fun."  We're off to Bath & Body Works to get some bubble bath!  Can't take a bath in a deep soaking tub without the ambiance of candles, music, and bubbles!

Unveiling of the Ladies Room!

July 22, 2012


And a top of the morning to you all!!  Gosh, it's been awhile since I posted a blog.  Life has thrown me some curve balls I didn't expect and when they hit close to my heart, it takes me awhile to bounce back.


I am supposed to be in Minnesota with my high school friends enjoying a time at a lake house.  Alas, I am in Texas.  I had looked forward to the trip for months needing the filling of joy, laughter, and companionship.  Doing the right thing was an easy decision but it still was a huge disappointment not to get in Lilly and head north.  Even as I type, hot tears fall on my cheeks...  I've been blessed with messages from them ... oh, what special women they are!!


Would you believe ... I have a stress fracture in my left foot??!!  I had been hobbling around and finally cried "uncle" and went to the doctor.  Any time my body has to heal, Fibromyalgia rears it's ugly head and I've have a tough time keeping my energy level up.  The nasty heat we've been having hasn't helped much either.


I've been doing 40 days of prayer for specific areas in my family's lives.  I must be doing some good as Satan has been throwing darts like crazy.  A prayer warrior on the front lines must be able to stay strong in the face of adversity.  Whenever Satan wants to really get to me, he attacks my heart, my love for my family, and my health.  Bizarre things going on ... 

Every closet should have a chair
& something fun to draw you in!!

The completion of the casita is just around the corner.  I've been limping around trying my best to concentrate on decorating one area at a time.  I am having fun stretching myself to create outside the box.  Yesterday, I found a wonderful mannequin.  I sat in the store, gazing at it and falling in love.  I envisioned a lacy vintage gown gracing it's lovely curves or even a feathered boa draped about it's neck.  I had made a vow to myself to only put things in the casita that touched my heart and had meaning.  I've been concentrating on the bathroom and closet the past few days.  I want the casita to be fun ... to be whimsical and magical.

I enjoy soft lights and the scent of candles as I soak in tubs of fluffy bubbles.  What do you think of this lamp I found?  The ceramic birds in the nest caught my eye but the wispies around the shade had me digging into my pocketbook ... definitely a keeper!!  Every time I walk into the bathroom, I smile!

A bathroom fit for a queen! 

I still have a natural material round rug to find for the bathroom, a wreath to make for over the toidy, and the towel ring to put up.  For the most part, though, it's done and it makes my heart sing.  I'd been wanting a place for a painting my mother received for her retirement and, I decided that it would look wonderful overlooking the back of the tub.  I can stand in the middle of this tiny bathroom and when I turn in a circle ... I see something that gave my heart a sentimental tug or gave me a giggle.  Isn't that what our spaces are supposed to do?

The beautiful Lake Minnewaska painted by Mayme Kalina

I took my Bose radio out to the casita a couple days ago and have been playing Christian music 24/7.  Something really odd happened in there that kind of gave me the heebie jeebies.  I have a painting that I acquired some years ago of a young girl.  The painting reminds me of Melissa, a young woman who was a big part of my life for many years.  Well anyway...  I wondered if the painting would have a place in the casita and took it out to see.  I placed the painting above the fireplace and smiled.  Yes!!  Yesterday morning I went out to check on the casita ... the painting was laying on the floor in front of the fireplace.  The frame wasn't broken, the painting was okay, but, the small nails that held the painting to the frame were mangled.  The painting had been ripped from the frame...  I looked for signs of damage to the fireplace and floor ... nothing, not even a scratch...  How could a painting fly off a wall, land in front of the fireplace, and except for the mangled nails not show signs of falling???  Anyway, I reset the painting and it is now back up on the wall and I've had no more weird goings on...  My neighbor shook her head ... "Dottie, having Christian music playing is not going to ward off bad spirits."  I happen to disagree ... where there is God, there is NO ROOM for evil!!

Left side of closet

I've talked a lot about repurposing and the bathroom in the casita is a perfect example!  Decorating cost?? Less than $150.  Painting over tub came from the entry at the last house, painting back of tub was my mom's, plant came from back patio, table came from office at last house, painting in closet I had in storage, and chair was Mom Seidler's mothers.  I bought 2 rugs at TJMaxx - a lamp at Central Furniture  - and the mannequin at Pier1.  In the closet, I brought in a white bookcase that came from the office at the last house, a storage unit from our last house, and shoe rack from the last house.  I have a perfectly organized closet for no cost!!



May the Lord bless the fruits of your labor this day and always.  May you use the gifts He gave you whatever they may be.  The unveiling of the main room is next ... stay tuned!!

Always remember you are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!

Miss Dottie

Things that go bump in the night

July 7, 2012
 
Good Morning!  (Yawn)  I've been up since 4am.  On our way home from Waco late yesterday afternoon, the wind picked up and it started raining.  I was so excited because it meant that I wouldn't need to haul hoses to water my gardens.  I sat outside for a bit watching the rain come down ... the air was filled with scents of rosemary, thyme, and mint as rain drops kissed my herb garden.  I walked inside with a smile on my face and thought I would read awhile and watch a bit of television.

I don't know about you, but if I lay down in bed to read or watch television, it isn't long before I am asleep.  I'm not sure exactly what time it was, but I heard a loud crack and thud.  I wasn't exactly sure what happened but a loud bump in the night woke me and I called for Michael.  He went outside and, sure enough, a huge branch had fallen off the old tree in the center of the lower garden.  He said he couldn't see much in the dark and rain but that it looked like it was one of the larger branches.  The good news was that it hadn't fallen on the house.  The bad news would need to wait til morning.

I got up at 4 to see if I could see anything ... nope.  I made coffee and did some praying and went out at 5am to see if I could see anything ... nope.  Toby and Sadie heard me up and decided it was time for their breakfast.  I sat outside on the patio while they ate.  Gradually, the shadows began to take shape and I could see more.  The odd part is that the main part of the branch fell between the bistro table and two flower pots with smaller branches spreading out into the garden.  It smashed one chair to smitherines and knocked over the bird bath.  Other than that, damage is minor ... just a lot of clean up.

As I stared at the tangled branches, I had a flashback of the early morning storm last August while I was staying at my brother's home in Minnesota.  The damage on his farm was on a much larger scale but the sound of wind, rain, thuds, and bumps in the night were the same.  I was grateful that our clean up will consist of a large branch not the whole tree.  Think my brother could run down to Texas with his chain saw?!  We have more big branches that need to come down before they fall down ... one is over my neighbor's garage.  I'm sure Betty heard the thud and wondered... 

I had another flashback as well.  I could see myself as a very small toddler in my room at 205 North Franklin Street ... I had Teddy with me and was frightened of a noise coming from my closet.  I screamed for my dad.  He came up the stairs and I told him that I was sure there was a scary bear in my closet.  He walked into my closet with a flashlight and said, "No, no bear."  By this time, I was crying and sure that someone or something was hiding in there.  My dad was a man of few words and began taking everything out of my closet.  He lifted me from my perch on my bed and took me to the closet ... "See, nothing."  Even that didn't satisfy me because I heard something in there.  He sat me back on my bed and said, "Go to sleep."  I was awake for a very long time praying that God would save me from the bump in the night!  The next day, a mouse trap was set in my closet and it wasn't long before we caught the culprit.  205 North Franklin was an old house even in the 1940's lending to lots of mice seeking warmth from the cold of the winters!!

I must confess something ... once the old tapes in my mind were destroyed, there has been room for good tapes.  The bump in the night with my dad playing my knight in shining armor is a good tape.  No yelling, no screaming, no chastising ... just plain love between a dad and his frightened daughter.  There was something else I learned ... humans can only do so much, real peace and security come from my Heavenly Father.

Reality takes many forms.  For such a long time, I buried what was real and swearing that I had the best family ever which was my reality.  If that was true, then why did I behave the way I did?  It took lots of digging, lots of reality checks, and lots of good counseling to get to a place where I could digest the bad and regurgitate it leaving room for good.  If you're reading this, let me emphasize that you MUST fill the void with good or the bad will come back to destroy.  Whenever a not so good tape plays, I take my thoughts captive and examine them.  Is it something new that I need to deal with?  If yes, I start writing and connecting the dots.  If no, I consciously let the thought go and immediately sing a Christian hymn ... one of my favorites for this is:

Onward Christian Soldiers

Onward, Christian soldiers, marching as to war,
with the cross of Jesus going on before.
Christ, the royal Master, leads against the foe;
forward into battle see his banners go!
Refrain:
Onward, Christian soldiers, marching as to war,
with the cross of Jesus going on before.

2. At the sign of triumph Satan's host doth flee;
on then, Christian soldiers, on to victory!
Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
(Refrain)

3. Like a mighty army moves the church of God;
brothers, we are treading where the saints have trod.
We are not divided, all one body we,
one in hope and doctrine, one in charity.
(Refrain)

4. Crowns and thrones may perish, kingdoms rise and wane,
but the church of Jesus constant will remain.
Gates of hell can never gainst that church prevail;
we have Christ's own promise, and that cannot fail.
(Refrain)

5. Onward then, ye people, join our happy throng,
blend with ours your voices in the triumph song.
Glory, laud, and honor unto Christ the King,
this through countless ages men and angels sing.
(Refrain)

Don't you think that old hymn is appropriate for a time when we are doing battle with the evil one?  I did a UTube search on it and just melted listening to the music.  Such comfort ... such peace knowing that as long as I have Christ on my side, I'm going to be okay.

I hope and pray that your night was a peaceful one without any bumps in the night to wake you.  Until we meet again, know that you are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!

Miss Dottie

 

A thief that comes in the night...

Providence Village, TX

July 5, 2012

Gooooood Morninggggg, Readers!  Weren't the 4th of July fireworks spectacular this year?  We watched them at Providence Village last weekend and took in the Macy's fireworks on TV last night.  All I can say is WOW!!  At a time when our country is so crazy, it was heartwarming to see men, women, and children of all ages waving flags and singing.  I went to bed humming a medley of patriotic songs!!

I'm not sure who let Fibromyalgia in last night but I woke up this morning and wondered what in the world was going on.  I put one foot on the floor then the other and almost went to my knees.  Every bone and muscle in my body was screaming.  I thought that I must have been beaten in my sleep and actually looked for bruises.  None...  Just nasty old Fibromyalgia coming as a thief in the night to steal my day.  Anyone who has Fibromyalgia or knows of someone who does, can attest that it can be a nasty ugly thing.  I look okay on the outside but feel like a fog has entered my brain and a virus has taken over my body.  Craziest thing...  I get so upset when this happens because I have things I want to do today ... things I NEED to do today!!!!  I will get as my done as possible.

My mother had rheumatoid arthritis and she would have some nasty days ... I remember her telling me that she used to write something funny in the dust on her end table when her wrists didn't allow her to wield a duster.  I didn't understand that then ... I sure do now.  I am grateful for all the strides that have been made in dealing with osteoarthritis and Fibromyalgia because, for the most part, I function quite well.

I read about Paul in the Bible and the "thorn in his side" that was with him always.  (2 Corinthians 12:7-10) God chose not to heal him and that was okay with Paul.  I think that the degenerative disk disease, osteoarthritis, and Fibromyalgia are my thorns in my side.  I've prayed for healing but as of today, I still have my "thorns."  I am now praying to be content whatever comes my way and to have accelerated energy in my good days.  I am finding that I need more rest these days ... I NEVER used to take a nap unless I was sick or recovering from surgery.  Now?  I either have to take a siesta in order to stay up later or go to bed earlier.  Is that called rolling with the flow?

As a Senior Citizen, I am finding that each day has it's blessings and challenges.  Every time I go to visit Mom in the nursing home, I wonder if I will live like that one day.  Last summer, my friends Elaine and Pam were talking about their bucket lists.  Doing becomes more important each year for we know not what the next will bring.  I don't know about you but I need an infusion of positiveness and encouragement each day.  I don't do well with negative, hateful people who are disrespectful causing me distress.  Oh, it's fine to say that we shouldn't let negativism affect our lives but, I'm here to say it does affect me and it's been on my bucket list to limit time with sour apples!!

Hmmm...I just had several flashbacks so I need to get off that subject and put in a new tape.  I prefer to look forward not back ... to the light, not the darkness ... to joy, not gloom.  I look forward to the completion of the casita where there is peace and a sense of safety.  I am thinking of advertising in the newspaper to see if I can gather some women up for an in home Bible study.

My reading through the Bible continues.  I am in Proverbs 18-21 today and learning about wise decisions in life.  "The yoke of the Lord Jesus will never fit on a stiff neck."~~ (Daily Walk Bible) ... "What a shame - yes, how stupid to decide before knowing the facts."~~Proverbs 18:13 ... "We can justify our every deed but God looks at our motives."~~Proverbs 21:2 ... "Don't repay evil for evil.  Wait for the Lord to handle the matter."~~Proverbs 20:22.  Lots of good stuff ... I'll be meditating on what I read throughout the day.

Seems odd having a holiday in the middle of the week.  Tomorrow is Friday!!  Yea!!  I hope that you have an absolutely fabulous day.  Don't get your knickers in a knot and fret about all what's wrong with today and those around you.  Put a smile on your face and greet the day with the gusto of a locomotive!!  As for me, I am off to take a little siesta then do what I can to clean up my messy casa!

Miss Dottie

God bless America!

July 4, 2012

It's July 4th, a day of celebrating Independence Day ... a day of picnics, song, parades, and fireworks.  I love it!!  I was hoping to have my flag up on the casita or on the front of the little casa but my handyman hasn't gotten to it.  Bummers!  My little flags are waving in the breeze and I look upon them fondly knowing that I live in an awesome country.

My father served in World War II and the American Flag has such deep meaning for him.  He fought in the trenches, and hoped he would stay alive long enough to return to the beloved country he represented.  In battle after battle, the flag stood tall.  All a soldier had to do was look to the flag ... they knew exactly what they were fighting for.  FREEDOM from tyranny!!

Today we travel about, we don't have to go through check points or worry about our homes being blown up.  We are able to wave our flags and sing patriotic songs ... God Bless America, The Stars Spangled Banner, America the Beautiful, Stars and Stripes Forever, Proud to be an American, This Land is your Land...  We are able to gather as friends and family enjoying our nation from sea to sea, north to south.  Michael and I went over to the nursing home at 2pm and to partake in the 4th of July Bingo Celebration Party with Mom.  She was like a little kid filling up her Bingo card!!

Did freedom mean more to those who gave their lives fighting for it?  My father was a young man full of life and joy ... he gave his all as a soldier not knowing how it would affect him later in life.  He lived a life worthy of a veteran of war.  It grieved him deeply when his son fought in Viet Nam and our soldiers were looked down upon.  How cruel of us as citizens to blame our soldiers for doing what they were asked to do.  Yet, we have that freedom to protest don't we?! 

Today is about freedom.  I blog not worrying that I will go to jail for my faith and being open about my life's journey.  I am able to choose where I live.  If I am in bondage, it is of my own making.  Freedom means I take responsibility for my own actions.  Think on that last sentence if you will...  I can choose and that means a lot to me.  I picked up my father's dog tags this morning and held them tightly (I keep them in a little white box that was my great grandmothers next to my bed).  I prayed hoping that my father heard my petitions of appreciation.  I know he's waving his flag today in heaven!!

G'daughter Madison

I will be traveling to Minnesota in July to gather with some high school friends at a lake house in Elko.  I am blessed to have the freedom to do that.  My granddaughter will be flying to Texas in July to spend time with me.  She has the freedom to do that.  We are able to come together without fear and I am grateful!!  We have the freedom to work at the jobs we desire; we have the freedom to enjoy attending the church of our choice; we have the freedom to speak our minds; we have so much!!!

Happy 4th of July, Readers ... The price of freedom is high and not something to be taken for granted.   Guard your heart AND your freedom!  America began as the land of opportunity and immigrants came in droves.  My great grandparents on my father's side and my gr-gr-gr-gr grandparents on my mother's side came from Norway and England respectively.  Land of the free and the brave.  Free?  Freedom!  Brave?  To come to a land of the unknown took courage and bravery.  To fight in wars and give one's all takes bravery.  To stand up for what's right is bravery.

I am proud to be an American ... at least I know I'm free ... I stand up and salute the flag this day and every day knowing that I have a responsibility to my family and my country.  If we aren't diligent, the country as we know it, will cease to exist and blood will run across our countryside.  You say that will never happen?  Study European history and American history ... you'll get my drift.  The time to stand up and be counted is TODAY!!

Mom loves the
American Flag too!!

Parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, friends tell your young ones about those in your families that have served in the wars for freedom.  Tell them about 9-11 and how quickly life can change.  Teach them to be responsible and accountable as citizens.  Let them see the love in your eyes and hearts that you have for our beloved country.  Enjoy your day and wave a flag (even if it's in front of the television watching the fireworks!).

This 4th of July 2012 will soon come to a close.  Think I'm going to enjoy some Tex Mex and check to see when the fireworks in Washington start.  Until we come together for another chat, I am wishing you freedom, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness all mixed up with a love of our Lord God!!

Miss Dottie

 

   

An investment in an outcome!

July 3, 2012

Hammers are hammering ... paint brushes are swooshing ... claw foot tub going in...  I would say that the crew is hard at work early this morning!  I got up to take the dogren out and spied Lupe before 8am.  It has been rather exciting being on site watching the repurposing of the old garage into a casita.  It won't be long and I can start "decorating."  Ye Ha!!  I can't wait to show you the end result!!  Watch for the unveiling!!!!!

I decided I would "help" paint yesterday and, as luck would have it, I dropped a tray full of white paint on the floor.  Hey, it was just an accident!!  Benito was here to work in the bathroom and gave us a two hour window to get the baseboards painted and the final coat of paint around the claw foot tub.  Lupe had been out on a job and hadn't expected Benito until late yesterday.  Communication fellas!!  Anyway, the paint I dropped was in the closet and Michael and I could continue painting.  Actually, it was fun being a part of the repurposing project.  I am a hands on person anyway and have learned that the more I invest myself in a project or event, the more I appreciate the end result.

Come to think of it, our investment in anything often times results in appreciation.  To be given everything without an investment results in a feeling of entitlement.  What happens if we put in the work to achieve?  We develop a good work ethic, our brains and bodies stay in shape, our self esteem is raised, we are filled with satisfaction of a job well done, and, we want to improve.  What happens if we develop a feeling of entitlement?  We become people that think in terms of you owe me; that was yesterday what are you going to do for me today; the centering becomes on the self (I want what I want when I want it - how dare you disappoint me; and, we become people that live with our hands out.

I have lived with plenty and lived with nearly nothing.  The times I grew the most and my creative juices flowed was when I had to figure out a way.  I used to be on the speaker's forum for the (then named) Collin County Women's Shelter.  I had women say to me, "I can't get a job, I don't have the clothes to wear for an interview ... look at you, you don't understand."  I assured them that I did understand ... they could visit Goodwill or other charities to purchase clothes for next to nothing.  They could call the shelter for resources for clothing, help in the interviewing process, go to the library ... the list was endless for them to take advantage of.  They could remain victims or become victorious.  Being victorious would mean work ... hard work!  The question was, "How badly do you want to have a new life?"  Insanity is doing the same things over and over and expecting different results.  You can apply that to anything in life ... HOW BADLY DO YOU WANT SOMETHING???!!

From the time I could think for myself (which was quite early in life), I knew that I wanted a healthy, purpose-filled life.  Something deep inside me, rared it's head up when I experienced things that were dysfunctional and not so good.  The problem was that when I was a child, I thought like a child.  I didn't have the tools I needed to set good boundaries.  I learned to be quiet and stay out of the way ... I didn't rebel, I was a compliant.  The problem with that was that when I left home, the tools I had didn't fit the problems I encountered.  My compliance gave way to me being prey for smooth talking suitors.  I lost me for a period of time because I just flat out didn't know...

As parents and grandparents, I think it's our responsibility to encourage and edify our children and grandchildren and give them the tools they will need to move away from home and into adulthood.  No one can have a good fulfilling life without tools and respect for self and others.  My children learned that hard work afforded them educations, a strong ethic and moral compass, and compassion for others.  They've had their share of bumps in the road yet knew that they weren't alone ... they knew that the Lord was right beside them as their constant companion.  It is my belief that there is something good in everyone -- that although we are born with a sin nature, it can be overcome with faith in God, hard work, love, understanding, and grace. 

Last weekend, I spent time with my son and his family.  My grandsons are happy well-adjusted boys.  They are being raised with discipline, education (school/church), and love.  The boys are so different yet they are alike in their convictions.  They are exuberant and expressive yet well mannered and considerate.  They know that grandma ALWAYS carries a camera to record their activities and love to pose.  Each year we review the photos from the past moving forward and they hoot and holler at changes in themselves and the consistency of what they truly have passions for.  I am invested in them as a grandparent and their parents are invested in giving them a tool box full of wonderful tools. 

What are you investing in?  Where do you spend most of your time?  I take my thoughts captive examining them to see if they are going to give me a good return.  At sixty-five, I've been around the block a time or two and hopefully I've gained some wisdom!!

I am now reading Proverbs.  If you're looking for wisdom, give this book of the Bible a read.  There are times that I think I need to read one of the Psalms and one chapter of Proverbs every day ... it's a sure way to make an investment in a positive outcome!!

It's a beautiful day ... not so hot that I can't be outside.  Always remember that you are in my thoughts and prayers ... YA YOU!!

Miss Dottie

Convicted!!

July 2, 2012

And a good morning to you, Readers!  It's rather overcast and goofy looking here in Central Texas this morning.  I keep thinking that it's going to pour down rain any moment and have put off watering.  I grabbed my Daily Walk Bible and finished up reading the Psalms ... was quite pleasant outside ... not so hot with a gentle breeze blowing.  I am content, rested, spiritually filled, and set to take on my day!!

I have some really good news this morning.  Sadie seems to have turned a corner and is better.  Dr. Arnold said that it would take awhile for the meds to kick in so I am hoping she is on the road to better days.  Thank you everyone for your prayers and concerns.  I appreciate them, believe me! 

Ever been convicted about something out of the blue?  In my 40 days of prayer for specific things for my family, I also prayed that God would create in me a clean heart.  (Psalm 51:10)  I REALLY meant that.  Well, be careful what you pray for...  My daughter in law, Angie, was baptized on Sunday at the Prestonwood campus in Prosper, TX.  Not only was her baptism touching, the sermon that Pastor Mark gave hit me like a ton of bricks.

What is our purpose on earth?  Isn't it to draw others closer to Christ?  Don't people draw near to people they want to be like and respect?  How are the lost supposed to act?  Lost that's how.  Duh!  As Christians we want to hold all others to this standard that we can't meet ourselves.  How did Jesus handle meeting the woman at the well?  Did He condemn her and scream at her?  No, He drew her in, understanding her, comforting her then telling her to go and sin no more.

I am that woman at the well.  I have had five husbands ... I have struggled with self-sabatoging behaviors my entire life.  I have stumbled and fallen so many times that I've lost count.  I've pissed people off and have had the elders of a church shake their fingers at me.  My eldest daughter decided I am not fit to be called her mother.  I've had Christians look at me with disgust.  You think I'm kidding?  I'm not.  When I went through childhood trauma counseling, my counselor told me that I was lucky that my mind was intact ... not only had I gone through childhood trauma, I had experienced the worst sort of emotional and physical abuse as a young woman.  How would you expect me to behave?  Based on the facts of my life, how would you judge me?

I never wanted to be a victim, I wanted to be victorious.  I never wanted to be hated, I wanted to be loved.  I never wanted to have fingers pointed at me, I wanted to be understood.  I had a hole in my heart as big as Texas and shovels of dirt that I kept trying to fill it with.  Dirt...  Mud...  Bad relationships...  Anger...  Inconsistent boundaries...  It wasn't until I truly gave my life over to the care of the Lord that I gave up the shovel for a Bible and good tapes.  When others said I was bad, God told me I was worthy.  Why could I work so well with women in shelters?  Women who were stumbling?  Wounded women?  Because I knew them, that's why.  They were my sisters...  I didn't look down on them, I could lift them up.  They helped me heal and I will be forever grateful to those women that God brought into my life.  Besides those women I spoke to and taught, God brought seasoned Christian women to come alongside me and teach me.  My friends in Christ, counseled me, brought me book after book and answered questions I had.  I discovered gifts that I never knew I had and gradually ... one day at a time, I began to heal and grow and mature.  Am I there yet?  No ... that will take a lifetime.  I'm up for the challenge! I chose to model my life after the winners that I could put a hand out to the less fortunate.

Okay, back to my conviction ... I realized that in my own hurt that I had been condemning others albeit with good intentions.  I sat in the second row at church with tears streaming down my face.  I felt like such a hypocrite.  In my wanting others to measure up to what "I would do," I used words that wounded.  Oh yes, I had been hurt and that's a fact.  BUT ... two wrongs don't make a right and I struck back.  Did it get me what I desired?  No.  It only drove a wedge between me and the person I wanted to be close to.  I knew I needed to apologize ... not later but as soon as possible.  I was broken and my heart hurt.  I was able to look at them, not me and realize my part.  It is my deepest hope that my apology was accepted and that the wall constructed so many years ago could come down.  No matter what happens, God convicted me and I was obedient...  I did my part, the rest I leave to the Lord.

I'm never going to be perfect and I'm going to make bad mistakes in life.  That being said, I am learning to live taking my thoughts captive before I act hastily.  I am learning to think about what I am allowing into my life, mind, and heart.  I've lived way too much on the feelings side.  I've given love away to those I shouldn't have and turned away those I should have embraced.  Why?  Because I was lost and lived on empty that's why.

Pastor Mark read the Prayer of Francis of Assisi ... I think it's worth closing my blog with.

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury,pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen

It is my hope and prayer that you, my Readers, will find it in your heart to be gentle with those in your household and the world around you.  As Christians, what have we gained if what we do and say in judgement turns the world off.  We are to be an example that others would want to be like us and would want to know Jesus as their personal savior.  We are to love the sinner and hate the sin ... tough, I know!

It is through my blog that I want you to know me, the real me.  I want to edify and encourage you letting you know that if I could be victorious, you can too!!!  I walk in truth and light.  I pick and choose my battles carefully.  If you ask me to give an account for what I believe, I will.  It is my fervent hope that you will see Christ's love in me ... that you will see my heart as one of forgiveness and grace.  Come on, Readers, let's walk this journey of life together.  We have much to be greatful for!!

Miss Dottie