Cashmere Bouquet

"Anyone's life truly lived consists of work, sunshine, exercise, soap, 

plenty of fresh air, and a happy contented spirit."

 ~ Lillie Langtry

January 29, 2014

Dear God,

It's a great morning in North Central Texas! Thank you for a great night's sleep. I'm feeling good today and ready to take on the world!!

A couple weeks ago, I tagged along with my friend, Beverly, when she went to Waco. There was a new 99 Cent Store that opened next to Hobby Lobby and she wanted to check it out. I must say I was impressed and couldn't believe the bargains.

As we were walking up and down the aisles, I couldn't believe how much 99 cents bought. Quite by accident (my purse fell off the cart and I bent down to grab it), the bar soaps caught my eye. There sitting on the shelf was Cashmere Bouquet (2 bars for 99 cents). I picked up the box and sniffed. Oh gosh, that scent took me back to my Grandmother Maggie's bathroom. There on the pedestal sink base would be a fresh bar of Cashmere Bouquet ... another bar would be sitting in the holder hooked to the claw foot tub. Just like when my children get a whiff of Youth Dew, the memory of that scent flooded my mind with smiles. Grandma ALWAYS smelled so good and always of Cashmere Bouquet.

I HAD to have this special soap and couldn't wait until bath time to unwrap a precious bar. In fact, the soap was all I purchased and put a bar in my purse. I would take it out every now and then and breathe in. Ahhhhhh... When I got home, I showed Michael my treasure. He looked at me like I was nuts ... guess Cashmere Bouquet is a girl thing! He he At any rate, I not only had one but TWO bars of soap.

Bath time came a little early that evening (on purpose). I unwrapped a bar, put it in my soap holder, and set about getting set for a good soak. The soap lathered up nicely and gave off a warm scent. I was like a pig in a sty only my sty was a tub filled with frothy bubbles. I scrubbed, I rubbed, and I drank in the fragrance of yesteryear. I dried myself off and ... well, I usually use a body lotion after my bath and didn't have any unscented to keep that lovely scent about me. Bummers...

Well, wouldn't you know ... the soap dried out my skin and made my face and eyes itch. Within a couple hours I looked red as a beet and was miserable. What?? I was sure that when I stayed or visited with Grandmother Maggie I washed my hands and face. I was completely deflated. Cashmere Bouquet would need to be a remembrance of my sweet grandmother but not me.

Isn't that just the way things go sometimes? We remember something as being wonderful but when we go back to relive or retry, it's not cracked up to be what we expected. Ok, ok, Lord, I hear you chuckling up there. You're telling me that remembering isn't bad but now is now and I need to blaze my own paths and dream my own dreams. I get it, I get it!! It's Youth Dew by Estee Lauder and Red Door by Elizabeth Arden that are moi!!

What do you think about this, Lord? I signed up for Ancestry.com so that I could complete my paperwork for joining the Daughters of the American Revolution (my mother's side). They have a DNA service and I am thinking of doing it. I know more about my paternal genealogy simply because they were 100% Norwegian. It's my maternal heritage that I wonder about. I can trace the Hall side (grandfather) but not so much the Hollenbeck/Dunbar line (grandmother). I'm always up for an adventure!! Only thing is that once I start shaking that family tree who knows who is going to fall out. Isn't that the purpose though??!!

Today is a new day (sans Cashmere Bouquet) ... sigh. It is mighty cold out there so I did my morning soak in my tub adding some bath oil then slathered on lots of Youth Dew body butter. My skin feels so soft and I have a gentle scent wrapping my body like a cocoon. Best of all, I don't itch!!!

Father in Heaven, I love you ... everything about you, fills me with such joy. I know you are watching over me and my Readers paving the way for a wonderful day. No matter what happens, I know you are in control. My part? Love ... Hope ... Faith ... ACTION!! Help me Lord to think of some things to pass your love to my five "Pass It Forward" folks. Each is so precious to me and, I know, to you as well.

Amen...

Miss Dottie

PS To my Readers: So often it's the little things in life that we remember about those who have touched our lives ~ a scent, a smile, a kindness. I have been so fortunate to have had many people who have left their unique fingerprint on me ~ mind, body, and soul. We never know, do we, when we wake in the morning how important our presence could be to another soul walking beside us on this road of life. Let's keep our eyes open to what God is doing all around us. So often, it seems so ... ordinary. However, there are times he does something spectacular. Don't miss it because you weren't watching!

I only look innocent! ~Zeke

Oops, gotta run, I just saw a little white furry kid running through the cottage with a roll of paper towels in his mouth. Yesterday, he got a hold of the toilet paper ... he's a rascal BUT oh he gives me such joy!!

Enjoy your day!!

Morning REFRESH

"In the silence of the heart God speaks. If you face God in prayer and silence, God will speak to you. Then you will know that you are nothing. It is only when you realize your nothingness, your emptiness, that God can fill you with Himself. Souls of prayer are souls of great silence."

~Mother Teresa

January 28, 2014

Dear God,

Good Morning, Lord! It's me, Miss Dottie and it's a Psalms kind of morning!!

"I sleep and wake up refreshed because you, LORD, protect me." (Ps 3:5)

"You, LORD, are my protector. Rescue me and keep me safe from all who chase me." (Ps 7:1)

"I will praise you, LORD! You always do right." (Ps 7:17)

"You listen to the longings of those who suffer. You offer them hope, and you pay attention to their cries for help." (Ps 10:17)

"I trust your love, and I feel like celebrating because you rescued me. You have been good to me, LORD, and I will sing about you." (Ps 13: 5-6)

"Only you are my Lord. Every good thing I have is a gift from you." (Ps 16:1-2)

"I love you, LORD God, and you make me strong. You are my mighty rock, my fortress, my protector, the rock where I am safe, my shield, my powerful weapon, and my place of shelter." (Ps 18:1-2)

"Show me your paths and teach me to follow; guide me by your truth and instruct me." (Ps 25:3)

"At night we may cry, but when morning comes we will celebrate." (Ps 30:5)

"You have turned my sorrow into joyful dancing. No longer am I sad and wearing sackcloth. I thank you from my heart, and I will never stop singing your praises, my LORD and my God." (Ps 30:11-12)

"You said to me, 'I will point out the road that you should follow. I will be your teacher and watch over you. Don't be stupid like horses and mules that must be led with ropes to make them obey.'" (Ps 32:8-9)

I must be patient and trust you, Lord. Grant me an extra measure of strength when all (seemingly) goes well for those who do sinful things. (see Ps 37:7)

"As a deer gets thirsty for streams of water, I truly am thirsty for you, my God. In my heart I am thirsty for you, the living God. When will I see your face?" (Ps 42:1-2)

"I have sinned and done wrong since the day I was born. But you want complete honesty, so teach me true wisdom. Wash me with hyssop until I am clean and whiter than snow. Let me be happy and joyful! You crushed my bones, now let them celebrate. Turn your eyes from my sin and cover my guilt. Create pure thoughts in me and make me faithful again. Don't chase me away from you or take your 5-Holy Spirit away from me." (Ps 51:5-11)

Amen, it is so...

Miss Dottie

PS to my Readers: In the times of our greatest distress we can trust in this promise: God hears our prayers (Isaiah 38:5) While we weep, God captures our tears as they fall. He carefully collects our sorrows and holds them close. (Ps 56:8) Believe me, God has noticed the times we have strayed and have stumbled. Yet, no matter how weak our words may seem, God does NOT forget the cries of those in need. Why? ...So that we would please him and follow the light that leads to life eternal.

It's a beautiful sunny day here in North Central Texas albeit quite chilly! I can't wait to experience all that God has in store for me this day (and, for you too!)

Oh my, oh my, oh my

1918 ~ 1973

January 27, 2014

Dear God,

First of all, I need you to do something for me. Please find my dad in Heaven and wish him a Happy Birthday from me. I always think about him on his special day and pray that he is at peace from the lingering torments of war atrocities. Only you know the full extent of trauma this young man from small town America endured. I want to say, "Thank you" for healing my heart, mind, and soul and being able to love my father as Christ has loved me. To have been healed and be made whole has been a divine miracle!

Ernest Tilman Pederson was born to Carl August and Margaret Bertine Torguson Pederson on January 27, 2018. He was delivered at my grandmother's sister's home (Bessie Kaldahl) ... my grandmother's last child ~ number 7.  Raising my cup of joe to you this morning, dad!!

The Kaldahl Home where my father was born
(photo taken 7~2011)

Secondly, this morning I was a woose. I was flat out in pain and life just plain sucked. My usual positiveness went on vacation leaving me to give myself a pity party and curl up with a heating pad. I can totally understand why people with chronic illnesses, continual pain, and situations that seem so unsolvable just give up. I won't; but, I understand...

You know, Lord, it really is true, we don't know the real value and blessing of something until it is no longer. I've never been a sickly person and still am not. It's my bones that started giving me fits when I was in my 50's. My first back surgery was in 2004 and I can't even count anymore how many surgeries I've had on my feet, neck, and back. The problem with all those surgeries was that they threw my body into a tailspin and I developed Fibromyalgia from the physical trauma. Needless to say, I am doing everything possible to avoid further surgeries. I am praying for you, the Great Physician, to heal my bones. I know you eventually will; however, until then, please grant me an extra measure of patience and peace.

I look back remembering my weight lifting days, my dancing days, my traveling days, my hands on decorating days and, I guess, I thought they would go on forever. What I couldn't even begin to think was that I wouldn't be able to do whatever I wanted to do in retirement. Can I be honest with you, Lord? That pisses me off and makes me sad. I hate to be a burden to those around me which makes me even happier that I have you to talk to. I know you will never leave me nor forsake me (Deuteronomy 31:6) and that you will never take me where you cannot sustain me. Life truly is so very fragile yet I never go down without a fight!

What do I do when life deals me lemons? Make lemonade! Let's see what was my lemonade of life today. Wellll, the gas fireplace in the cottage has been on the kafritz for weeks now. I could turn it on manually by getting down on my knees but that was frustrating the fool out of me. I got out the manual and filled the claw foot tub with lots of hot bubbly water. While I soaked and cleared the cobwebs from my mind, I started at step 1... Problem was, I got out of the tub and promptly forgot about the fireplace deciding instead to read Mary Higgins Clark's TWO LITTLE GIRLS IN BLUE.

One thing about retirement nothing has to be done at a precise moment. I enjoyed the book (it must have been good because I read it in a single sitting) then moved on to a load of laundry. Tonight when I came out to the cottage, it was cold and I remembered my quest to fix the remote. Michael was fussing at me saying I was going to set myself on fire so I shooed him out. I FINALLY got new batteries in and, at least now, it is working with the remote. Yay!! His last words to me ... "You are so darn stubborn." I guess I am.

It is late and my eyelids are starting to droop. I have warm jammies to climb into, my furry kids have been out for last potty call, and I want to put on some soft music and read a Psalm or two.

1940's ~ 50's Men's Fashion

Don't forget now, Lord, to find my dad. He's probably out dancing with my mom!! Do you suppose the Dorsey brothers are playing the Boogie Woogie? Funny the things I remember ... my dad and uncles were such sharp dressers ... In January, they'd all be wearing long winter coats, leather gloves, hats, and things they called "rubbers" that fit over their spit shined shoes. Their suits fit perfectly, white shirts starched, and ties deep with color. Something else I remember ... my dad loved my mom and my uncles loved their wives. Family was really important!! I like thinking about that.

Watch over my Readers, Lord. Grant them a good night's sleep waking them to a new tomorrow filled with love, laughter, and YOU!!

Amen.

Miss Dottie

PS I like it that you've put so many wise people on this earth. I've been reading a little bit about Eleanor Roosevelt and like this particular quote: "When you have decided what you believe, what you feel must be done, have the courage to stand alone and be counted." Know what I stand for? I BELIEVE in YOU!!!!

PSS 

Dad ~ Thanks for sending these love
letters to Mom; and, Mom ~
Thanks for keeping them. They give me
warm fuzzies when I read them.

Laughter, medicine for the soul

January 26, 2014

Dear God,

Laughter comes from unexpected places. This was posted on Facebook and I haven't stopped laughing. What is it about a Cheshire Cat grin added to some "words" that just makes me want to jump up and down howling with glee?

I know from personal experience that you have a wonderful sense of humor. You'd  have to with all us crazy Christians scurrying around trying to fool you, impress you, and think you don't see through us. Funny thing is, you know us inside and out and love us in spite of our warts, bumps, and trials!

Bill Cosby released a record in the 60's that still makes me laugh. It was about a conversation between Noah and you, Lord. I wonder if any of my Readers would remember it. Maybe I laugh because I talk out loud to you, too and there are times when I swear I hear you answering.

As an intercessor, you have entrusted me to pray for those you put on my heart. There are also times when I have visions of people I have no clue who they are but I just know they need your help. I used to question my own sanity at times; BUT, over and over, you've revealed that the visions are not just figments of my imagination. What I love most about being a prayer warrior is the joy that comes from obedience. When I get the itch to pray there is this sense of urgency then an overwhelming peace. (Smile)

The Fabulous Five get my tonsils tickling first thing in the morning ... who can be grouchy with five furry kids wagging their tails so hard their whole bodies shake? Kennedy was alive with these little squeaks this morning pressing his head into my chest. "Who's my boy? Ah yes, Kenne is my boy!" Ruffy got so wound up she clogged and sounded like a duck. Harmony was hovering over her bowl growling to keep the others at bay. Toby and Zeke were racing to see who could find their kibble first making noises like little roosters pecking at their food. (Giggle) Yes, there is laughter in Seidler Dogdom ... from morning to night!!

I must be honest with you, Lord. This morning, I was holding Harmony and, all of a sudden, I just started to boo hoo. Every now and then I think about Sadie and my heart hurts. I held Harmony so tight, she began to wiggle out of my grasp and lick away the salty tears from my cheeks.  Then I started thinking about Mom Seidler who passed away just a year ago and more tears welled up. I allowed myself a time to grieve then began to focus on today and what I could do to make my day special not only for myself but also for my precious dogren and others.  Hmmm, the wheels in my brain are turning!!

Father God in Heaven, take my life as a potter takes clay, molding me into a vessel pouring out the love you have bestowed on me. Help me to remember just how patient you have been with me over the years and how you loved me just as I was, a broken woman. Use my blog to speak to my Readers across the globe filling them with knowledge that I do pray for them and love them wherever they are.

Amen.

Miss Dottie

PS  "With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come." ~William Shakespeare

Pay it Forward

My own precious 'Doodle Bug' ~ Ruffy

January 25, 2014

Dear God,

Thank you for a good night's rest.  It got mighty cold here last night and my flannel sheets kept me (and the Fabulous Five) nice and toasty. The only one that preferred to sleep outside the covers was Ruffy ~ you've gifted her with a coat thick enough for a dozen dogs and she huffs and puffs when she gets too warm! I call her Doodle Bug because her coat drags on the ground ~ all you can see is this moving mop of red hair with a plume of a tail waving high in the air!!

The cold weather wreaks havoc on my bones but a nice fire not only warms them but also calms my spirit. I just love reading your word, sipping on a steaming cup of joe, and stroking the fur of one of my furry kids.  I think it is true, all the above are good medicine!

"Every Scripture is God-breathed and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work."

~Apostle Paul

I received the following post on Facebook yesterday morning:

"To start this year off in a loving way I'm participating in the Pay-it-Forward initiative... The first five people who comment on this status with "I'm in" will receive a surprise from me at some point in this calendar year- anything from a book, a ticket, a visit, something home-grown or made, a postcard, absolutely any surprise! There will be no warning and it will happen when the mood comes over me and I find something that I believe would suit you and make you happy.

These five people must make the same offer in their FB status and distribute their own joy. Simply copy this text onto your profile, (don't share) so we can form a web of connection and kindness.
Let's do more nice and loving things for each other in 2014, without any reason other than to make each other smile and show that we think of each other."

What a wonderful idea. I quickly responded to make sure I was one of the five on Jane's post and reposted it on my own status. I couldn't wait to see who would respond with an "I'm in!" By yesterday evening, I had my own precious five to spread my love and joy to! I am a giver so this will be right up my alley!!

You know, Lord, you tell us to love our neighbors as we love ourselves ... not more than or less than. I like that. I've never been one for having a ton of acquaintances ~ I'd prefer a special group of friends that I can get to know and love inside and out. AND, I like real people rather than those who are seemingly perfect!

For so many years I presented an image of having it all together. When I started dropping the layers of fear of people not liking me because I was flawed, I felt pretty raw and naked. I was like a turtle who stuck it's head out of it's shell only to pull it back in when (perceived) danger confronted me. The most amazing thing happened though ... I was able to relate to my fellow earthly travelers without judging. Whoopee!! What a freeing feeling.

The Garden Angel in
Miss Dottie's cottage
compliments of Jill

Lord, as I begin my day, I ask for special blessings for Jan, Jackie, Bonnie, Kat, and Chuck. Fill them with a sense of peace knowing that you and I will be there to pray for them and lift them up no matter what they face in 2014. AND, while I have you "on the line," I also want you to bless all my Readers!!  Boy howdy!!!! It feels so good to get outside of myself and think about ... well, "I got this joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart ... down in my heart to stay!!!"

Amen.

Miss Dottie

PS "When you take time to study and practice the word of God, you become like a barrel of great beauty, filled with the energy drink of love with which you inspire people to inspire other people!" ~Israelmore Ayivor

I sure like that quote, don't you? I love the idea of love being an energy drink that inspires us to be greater than what we would normally be. Ready to take on my day, I hope you are too!!

The North Wind Doth Blow

Brrr, Toby says it's cold outside!

January 23, 2014

Good Morning, Lord!  It's a mighty cold windy day in North Central Texas. The Fabulous Five went out for potty call this morning and the wind blew Harmony and Zeke over.  They yelped and headed for the casa.  Now they've been afraid to step off the back step.  Thank goodness they will use a wee wee pad.  It's supposed to be even colder tomorrow before warming up into the 60's for the weekend.

I am actually enjoying my day inside.  I've had the bug to read and, you know me, once I get my hands on a good book, I can't put it down.  My friends and family in the north country are freezing their tootsies off so I pray for warm homes and safety if they have to go out.

I had my yearly physical on Tuesday. I've been struggling with tiredness, Fibro, and knew it was time to haul myself in and get the year started out right. I had met Michael's doctor last week and liked him a lot so I made the switch ~ I must say, I wasn't sorry. I did receive a shock though ... my (always normal) EKG was abnormal showing that I had had a heart attack at some point. Good grief! I didn't expect that although my neighbor had told me that my symptoms of a few weeks ago were similar to hers when she had a blockage in her heart. (felt like someone was sitting on my chest & had pain between my shoulder blades)  Anyway, I was off to the hospital yesterday for blood work.  The doctor had ordered it stat so I should get those results today or tomorrow.  It's so hard to tell serious illnesses from Fibro attacks and I hate going in to the doctor for every little this and that. Guess I need to be more aware... Please help me know when I need to act and when I can sit back and wait for the storm to pass. My Readers with chronic illnesses and pain can relate, I am sure.

In my quest to surround myself with interesting bits, I came across my mother's high school diary. I'll bet she's grinning up in heaven knowing that I am learning more about her now in 2014 (the diary covers a time of the late 1920's early 1930's). It's always been interesting to me that my mother chose to be so quiet about who she was and for the time we spent during my growing up years she didn't talk much at all ... for that matter, even in my adult years, she would avoid talking about her own growing up years and her life in general. I've been able to gather bits and pieces about her from family, her diary, and, out of her own mouth when pestered enough (she always told me that I talked early and never did shut up!) Lord, if you see her, tell her that I'm proud of her playing guard on the girls (first team) basketball team, doing the high jump (wow, 4'2"), running hurdles (first place), skating, running the fifty yard dash (second place), playing the fiddle, flying an airplane, and winning a 4-H trip to University Farm in St. Paul, MN (leadership training). I could go on ... she was always a top notch employee wherever she worked learning quickly and doing more than was expected. Because she didn't marry my father until she was in her thirties, I would suspect that her life was filled with adventures. I always admired my mom for her beauty and for her extra long legs.  Somehow, I got the "short" end of the gene pool! LOL I know, I know, I am fearfully and wonderfully made ... a perfect moi!

Phew, Lord, that wind is blowing mighty hard. the wind chimes in the garden are really making music and leaves are being blown here and there within the fence. One of my neighbors lost a huge tree limb. If you don't mind, keep those limbs attached to the tree in the back yard. I'd prefer not to get scrunched with one falling down on the casa and/or the cottage.

Lord God, have I told you lately how much I appreciate you being in my life? If it weren't for you, I'd still be dragging myself through the muck and mire of shame thinking I was the biggest loser on this earth. It has felt so good to be able to hold my head up and be transparent not only to you, but to my Readers, and the world. To have enough courage to own up to my past life, make amends, and move on has been so darn freeing. The biggest gift you've given me is knowing that I am worthy and being able to truly face truth and light with dignity and humility. It's a gift I pray that everyone would share with me.

Amen.

Miss Dottie

PS  In Job 37:9, you tell us that "Out of the south comes the storm. And out of the north the cold." Lord, you weren't a kiddin'! I just walked from the cottage to the casa and had to put my head down into the wind to keep from wobbling. That north wind doth blow!!!

Zeke does zzzz's

PSS The troops are all tuckered out after a morning's romp of roughhousing. Come to think of it, I think a nap is just what the doctor ordered!

Toby in dreamland

Kennedy loves his siestas

Ruffy & Harmony
love to snuggle with each other!

A little joy...

"I don't think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains." 

  ~Anne Frank,

the Diary of a Young Girl

January 15, 2014

Dear God,

You know how much I love my space in the cottage, Lord. Having my own playhouse gives me enough space to expand my creative juices and I cherish that.

Thank you for the sale of the clock at the Antique Mall and for the funds made available to purchase a small table to use as my desk in the cottage. Trying to type my blogs while balancing my computer on my knees was getting old ... my furry kids would walk across the keys trying to sit in my lap and I'd have quite a mess!  Now they just stand on the back of the sofa and peer over the computer at me!

Whatcha doin'? ~Zeke

Lana (antiques dealer) gets cartons from England and has the most amazing stuff in her booth at The Antique Mall. Since I love Country English and Country French pieces and accessories, it is my first stop when I walk through the door. I saw this little table tucked away and decided to check it out. Yes!! I thought it was just a small table BUT when we loaded it into the car, the top swiveled and opened to reveal a wonderful  game table. It is a wonderful addition to my cottage and is a welcome change to my being able to write undisturbed.  (The dogren do have a bed next to the table so they aren't far away!)

I've had a tough time adjusting to the yellow floral sofa I got for the cottage.  I am just not a pastel person and there have been times that I have just wanted to cover it with a white throw. Welllll, a few days ago, I went down into the storm cellar to check out my accessory cabinet. I found several blue and white pieces and decided to  them a try. I couldn't believe it, the deep blue seemed to deepen the fabric on the sofa and my aesthetic sense quieted. I think I was trying to go in a decorating direction that just wasn't working for me.

As a person charmed by design and balance, I love to play with the unusual incorporating it into my space. Sometimes it works and sometimes not. If what I am doing is making me edgy, I keep on until I get it right hauling out things from the storm shelter and combing antique stores, Goodwill, and garage sales. You wouldn't believe what I have uncovered in out of the way places! Michael and I visited a large antique store in the metroplex and found the costs to be exorbitant. Luckily, the steep pricing hasn't found it's way to small town America. A butter pat dish similar to one I bought here for 50 cents was $22 or more depending on who made them. They do make lovely places to set rings or earrings when I'm too lazy to take them to my jewelry hanger.

There are some people who travel the world and a part of me would like to do that too. There are some people who pay mucho bucks to sit on the 50 yard line at the Cowboys football games and a part of me would like to do that too. More than anything though, I love to motor to different towns in Texas and scour through the stores off the beaten pathways looking for a needle in a haystack bargain. I love original oil paintings and things that have the patina of age. I love a piece with a story that makes me smile. My space is my friend!! My love languages are quality time and words of affirmation; sooo, most of all I enjoy having visitors and just being with people.

As I have grown older, it's taken less and less to amuse me, satisfy my longings, and make me smile. A little joy goes a long way in making my heart sing. I've always been a voracious reader and truly revel in the days that my thinking isn't foggy from the Fibro and I can feast upon the pages. I am now finishing up on the book BONHOEFFER.  Ooohhhh, it's a great book.

Lord, BONHOEFFER has gotten me thinking about so many things going on now in our country. I totally understand why there should be separation of church and state BUT not God and state. There is a big difference. The moral compass of our country is a strong indication of who will be elected and welcomed as President of the United States. I am praying that a man or woman of strong moral character with the knowledge needed to lead a country into prosperity will come to the surface. I don't care whether he or she is a Democrat, Republican, or Independent. To study history is so important because history tends to repeat itself. I am always surprised at the number of people who are willing to sell their souls to the devil for a promised quick fix.

I have a very sick husband today ~~ we spent the entire morning at the doctor's office. I pray that you, as the great physician, would calm the spasms that wrack his body. I also want you to send your best angels to watch over my family, friends, and readers. There have been specific people that you have put before me for prayer and I am grateful to be an intercessor on their behalf. My daughter, Jill, has the dreaded flu as do so many in our part of the country. Be their chicken soup, Father, and heal their respiratory systems and every other part of their bodies that ache.

Amen.

Miss Dottie

PS  You know, Lord, that sometimes when I talk to you my thoughts ramble on from this to that. The good news is that first of all we talk and secondly, I know you can follow my ramblings. How cool is that!!

"Joy is the infallible sign of the presence of God."

~Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

From whence I came

January 15, 2014

Dear God,

The sun is shining so brightly I think I will need sunglasses to survey my gardens today! I love winter in Texas ... the periods of cold and the times of warmth and sun.

You tell me that I should be grateful in all things and, although I sometimes doubt that, in the end I would agree.  I've been too busy to read much over the past couple years and found that my mind had grown stagnant and less positive.  The dark cloud of Fibromyalgia landed on me with a vengeance last Friday and really knocked me on my butt.  I used my cane for a couple days but, in the end, I knew I needed to call "uncle" and just rest.

1Thessalonians 5:18 ~ "In every thing give thanks for this is the

will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

My son and family were here last Saturday (for a very late Christmas celebration) and he was mentioning that he had read Bill O'Reilly's KILLING JESUS.  He made it sound really interesting so I picked it up at Walmart.  I'd also started the Keith Craft's book, YOUR DIVINE FINGERPRINT and decided to finish that.  Sooo, for several days, I just rested and read.  Both books were so enlightening and truly fed my soul.  I still have a stack of books to read and am resolved to tackle them a chapter at a time each day.  I love to read so that won't be a momentous task. Today, I am feeling pumped about life in general.

In chapter 12 of YOUR DIVINE FINGERPRINT, Keith Craft talks about his family's foundation.  It really got me thinking of how, I too, was blessed to have parents who thought it was important for me to have a spiritual foundation.  Although my family was not religious ~ nor did we pray as a family ~ it was the glue that held us together.  I was enrolled in the toddler program when I was about 3 and continued classes until I graduated from high school.  Church was not forced on me but it was assumed that we would be attending every Sunday.  I had a Sunday best dress and a pair of Sunday best shoes that were layed out on my bed every Saturday night.  The Pederson family BELONGED to Glenwood Lutheran Church for several generations.  We didn't go to be entertained but to be fed AND to be of service.  In my case, it was true ~ train up a child in the way he would go and he will never depart from it. My faith has always been my foundation in life and when the storms rage, I've never felt alone.  My favorite song is The Anchor Holds by Ray Bolz. It's really the song about my life.

Proverbs 22:6 ~ "Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it." 

I always have enjoyed learning and growing as a person. As a relationship coach/professional matchmaker, I wanted to be the best and read every book available to enlighten me. As an interior designer, I have always loved making my home comfy and beautiful and have studied every magazine, book, and television show gaining knowledge from the best of the best. I like finding ways to do the undoable and touching people's lives for Christ. You know what? I've stepped out in faith many a time, failed miserably more often than I can count, and continued in my journey towards inner peace, joy, and passion. Now, I am learning how to garden and boy it's been tough. I gain momentum from spending time with passionate people who are willing to go that extra mile.  I get that joy, joy, joy, joy, down in my  heart.  (Smile)

Today, I am continuing on in my 2014 resolutions to REFRESH! I must say that it is working for even though I've gone through grief in losing Sadie, there is so much life around me with the Fabulous 5. I will never forget my Sadie girl and every day I laugh remembering some little thing she used to do. I find that when I am deep in thought remembering, there is one (or more) of the puppies to nudge me and bring me back into the present. I am blessed.

As my readers begin their days, I pray, Father, for their good health, for their strained finances, for their troubled relationships, and for their inner peace. They need to know they are loved and prayed for so thank you for those you put in my heart and in my path of life.

Amen.

Miss Dottie

PS  Am meditating on your living word today, Lord.  It is so true...

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." 

~ Philippians 4:13

     

Raindrops, so many raindrops

January 8, 2014

Dear God,

Nightfall has come and I am sitting here in the cottage listening to the rain drops hit the roof. The pitter patter seems so soothing to my ragged emotions. Yet, in all my pain, I would never wish to have not had Sadie in my life. A season of tears is nothing compared to the joy and years we shared.

I remember driving over to Dr. Arnold's office and praying that somehow you would take this task from me. From deep inside me, I heard this small soft voice saying, "I will not remove this from you; however, I will give you strength today and courage to face the days ahead." Some folks would say I must be crazy to hear your voice but I do hear it and I am NOT crazy. There is just this peacefulness that comes over me and I am able to put one foot in front of the other and move on. I can't explain the conversations we've always had, you and me ... as soon as I could walk, I headed for your house and looked for you.

"It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed."

 ~Deuteronomy 31:8 (ESV)

My wise companion
Kennedy

I must say, Father, that the Fabulous 5 are different with Sadie gone. We could sense it last night and for sure today. Kennedy has stepped up to the plate and has become the calm, non-agitated top dog; Toby and Zeke play tug of war without aggression; and, the little girls don't go into hysterics when one of the other dogs comes into their space. It's like a blanket of balance has covered Seidler Dogdom once again.

For the past few months (and especially over the past 13 days), we have walked on eggshells trying as best we could to divert Sadie from anything that would trigger an attack on the little ones (or us). I hadn't realized how having an unbalanced dog in the pack could create such turmoil for the entire family. It reminded me of times when I have walked on eggshells around certain people not knowing if or when something I said or did would create a rage or worse, my being isolated. As an adult working through childhood trauma that brought symptoms into my adult years, I was lucky enough to have experienced counselors help create an avenue on which I was able to walk without fear and condemnation. Thank you Lord, for those people who cared enough to be there when I finally could face truth and recognize that I was strong as a child and even stronger as an adult. I still celebrate that day!!

I am reminded once again of the circle of life ... that in my grief, the world moves on and people go about their lives without giving a thought to my loss. Let that be a lesson to me as I minister to others. When I walked through Walmart on Monday, I am sure that I generated some stares with my swollen eyes and tear stained face. The lady at the checkout who is usually so talkative was quiet and avoided eye contact. Help me to be bold in reaching out to others knowing how much I have appreciated the kindness bestowed upon me at this time (and just a year ago when Mom Seidler passed away). Just as Sadie crossed Rainbow Bridge, a new liter of Scottish Terrier puppies was being delivered. How odd ... with death comes rebirth generation after generation.

Father in Heaven, I thank you for listening to me and for the comfort I feel. Help me to move forward appreciating the days and years you have given me. Let me not take them for granted always thinking that there will be another day, another year. I want to smile and know that while I cannot change the past, I can learn from it and grow as your child.  I think of the story of David as he mourned for his ill child that he had conceived with Bathsheba. When the boy died, he got up and gave you thanks. (See II Samuel 12) Let me remember that as I pawrent the Fabulous 5. It was and still is my job to protect and provide for them; and, by golly, I am up to that!

Miss Dottie

PS  "What happens when you let go, when your strength leaves you and you sink into darkness, where there's nothing that you or anyone else can do, no matter how desperate you are, no matter how you try? Perhaps it's then, when you have neither pride nor power, that you are saved, brought to an unimaginably great reward." ~Mark Halperin

"Weeping may remain for a night, 

but rejoicing comes in the morning." ~Psalm 30:5

There's nothing sweet about saying goodbye.

Sadie ~ Summer 2013

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened."

~Anatole France

January 6, 2014

Dear God,

Today at 2:20pm my beloved Scottie, Sadie, crossed Rainbow Bridge. I just know you were there to greet her and that she was surrounded by familiar woofs and growls. That part gives me comfort; but my god, oh my god, how much it hurt to let her go and my tears won't stop flowing. My heart feels like it has been ripped out of my chest and squeezed until I can barely breathe. I wasn't ready Lord ... and no matter how many times I told myself, it was the right thing to do, I still wasn't ready. 

Sadie ~ Fall 2009

To have been owned by a Scottish Terrier was such a blessing for so many years. She was bright, stubborn, and had such a gentle spirit. When she left the house for a potty call, she always grabbed a favorite toy (anything pink!) and carried it with her until she finished her business. We always said we were going to video her but, sadly, we never did. As I said, she loved pink and had pink coats, pink collars, and pink blankets and bowls.  Yep, Sadie LOVED pink!!

My gray hairs are starting to show
 ~ Sadie 2012

When our youngest grandson was a baby, she would sit beside him ... if he started to crawl away, she would act as a buffer. I always laughed and said she would have made a great mommy to some Scottie puppies.  In fact, when we first adopted our little rescues, she loved them and almost treated them like puppies. She would sit high on her perch in the backyard watching over them and her domain.

Our Scottie girl had class, style, and was very prissy. She had a LOUD bark that would scare the crap out of anyone approaching her house or backyard but would lick them to death once they came inside. For so many years Michael and I would remark that we wished we could clone Sadie. She was that special!!

I love my gardens! ~ Sadie 2013

Sadie was a hunter and hunt she did. As a youngster, she would bring rabbits, birds, and mice into the house and drop them at our feet as if to say, "Look what I brought you." It would gross me out but to her, she had done what she was born to do.

To get her attention, we would say, "Look at me." She would stand at attention,  her eyes glued to our faces. After a "Gentle now, Sadie" she would nuzzle our hands for a treat. Life with Sadie was an adventure ... she loved to go to Lowe's and Home Depot greeting folks with her tail wagging. Not too many Scottie's around any more so she got lots of oohs and aahs.

Hey Zeke, hear that squirrel??
 ~ Sadie, Summer 2013

A trip to the doggy beauty shop was always a treat for Sade (except for the times that she got a bad haircut and then she would hide under the bed for a couple days). She loved to show off and could match any dog in the show ring's prance. She snored and had all these little crazy things about her that made her unique and so special.

Sadie loved the cold and snow!!

Sadly, Sadie succumbed to a number of maladies and we've had a continual battle with thyroid, heart, liver, allergies to the point where she pulled out mouth fulls of fur and cried out in pain. We would head for the vet for tests and new medications. One flea bite would send her allergies in to motion. She was allergic to so many things and as she grew older, the list grew longer. We would monitor the time she spent outdoors and make sure all medications were kept up to date.

Toby & Sadie
Guard dogs on duty 2011

Our grandsons had been here for a visit in mid August and she seemed fine but towards the end of August we began to notice a steady decline in her health and demeanor. We took her in to see Dr. Arnold and Dr. Young and we worked on a plan to see if we could help her. She became food aggressive, had no patience with the other dogs, and was in misery. She got aggressive with Kennedy, Toby, and Harmony to the point where she would have killed them without intervention. We talked about Prozac ... we talked about ways we could keep her triggers from escalating. When she attacked Harmony, Kennedy, Toby and turned on Michael when he intervened (11 days ago), it was time to realize something was really wrong. Sadie wasn't Sadie any more.

Ahhhh, I love to be outside!!!

Because Sadie had bit Michael and drew blood, Texas law requires that a dog be held in quarantine for 10 days. Sadie was put under house arrest. Dr. Young gave us a sedative to help take the edge off her aggression and our wait began. Sadie would have times where she was happy and then times when she would (even with the sedative) grow agitated and angry. Michael and I had a hard time facing reality hoping for a miracle. Even today ... it was time to get ready to go in to the vet's office and I put her leash on her.  There was that moment when I looked at my princess and I said to Michael, "I can't do this, there must be another way." Toby wanted to go with us and Michael picked him up so that I could get out the door. All of a sudden, Sadie lunged for Toby ~ luckily she was on that leash and I could hold her back. Something so simple could have meant... Well, you get my drift. It was then that I took a deep breath and took her to the car.

Sadie ~ November 2013

Dr. Arnold and Katrina (vet tech) were ready for us. They were so kind to Sadie and to us ushering us into a private room in the back of the clinic. They gave Sadie another sedative and told us we could spend some time saying goodbye. Dr. Arnold and Katrina have seen Sadie at her best, her sickest, and have worked with us diligently over the past couple years ... they loved her too. When Sadie was given her injection, we were there to say how much we loved her and appreciated the time we had with her. When she was still, Dr. Arnold, Katrina, Michael and I clung to one another with tears. 

Sadie will be buried on Dr. Young's ranch along with the other pets he has treated. I had wanted her buried in the back yard but that wasn't meant to be. Father God in Heaven, please take good care of my baby til I get there. She likes it if you scratch her under her beard and if you call her Lady Sadie she will wag her tail and prance by your side.

As for me, Lord, I am left with this big hole in my heart. Toby, Kennedy, Zeke, Harmony, and Ruffy have been so attentive tonight sitting on my lap and washing the tears from my face and I love them so. I love you too, Lord, for placing Sadie in my life for a season and I know that, in time, my grief won't be as debilitating and I can move on always knowing that I shared my life with a very special sweetheart.

To you, Sadie, in heaven ~ I loved you from the moment I saw you as a six week old puppy and I will always have a special place in my heart for the beautiful Scottish lass you were and always will be. You are now whole and free from the painful sores, a liver that was failing, and a myriad of other ills.  I wish you sweet dreams and happy hunting!

Miss Dottie

PS  Lord, Mark Twain said, "Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in."  I know for sure that Sadie is ready for her new duty ... guarding heaven's gates!!!