December 2, 2011

Good Evening, Readers!  Here's looking at you through the frosted window of Winter!!

I turned sixty-five today.  Somehow, I didn't feel much different that I did yesterday.  When I woke up, I jumped out of bed singing Happy Birtday to myself.  The girls had gone to school, Jane to work and Tim was walking Teddy.  I grabbed my usual Starbucks over ice and stepped outside into the sunshine...  Ah yes, I just knew it was going to be a great day!!

I guess turning sixty-five should be rather traumatic but, no, it hasn't been.  I'd rather think of it as reaching a milestone and being a better person physically, mentally, and spiritually than I was last year at this time.  There are so many new things to see, do, and accomplish.  I can't imagine settling for a rocking chair and just watching the boob tube!

My son-in-law, Tim, brought me some flowers today.  As he walked in the back door, the birthday balloon he was carrying got caught in the door and made one heck of a noise.  Sixty-five was coming in with a loud bang!!  Nothing like a good belly laugh to get my day off to a rip roaring start!!

Mom S called this morning to wish me a Happy Birthday.  Her eighty-five year old voice sounded strong and chipper.  "When are you coming home?  Better make it soon."  She cracks me up.  She gave me a birthday party last year in her room at the nursing home ... we had junior bacon cheeseburgers and frosties!  She asked me if I remembered ... I did...

My friend, Beverly, called and told me that her husband, Don, had mowed the yard at the little casa as a birthday gift.  Yea!!  I just love a manicured lawn!!  Michael phoned to say he had sent my card and to wish me a great day.  He and the dogren are missing me.  I loved reading my Facebook birthday wishes ... what sweet messages.

Jane phoned on her break this morning.  She wanted me to open my birthday present.  I called Tim in to join me and opened the box carefully ... I just love beautifully wrapped packages!  IT WAS A CAMERA ... A NEW CAMERA!!  I started to cry ... not tears of sadness but tears of gratitude and joy.  Never in a million years did I expect such a wonderful gift!

I decided that today I would do some things that I enjoyed and hadn't done in awhile ... I made white sugar cookies and chocolate truffles.  Yum!  I think I spied Tim raiding the refrigerator a few times this afternoon!  Jane is having a jewelry party Sunday night so hopefully there will be enough left for that ... if not, I'll need to warm up the oven again!

Today, I finished reading Andy Stanley's book ENEMIES OF THE HEART.  Every month, I like to read a book that fuels my continuing journey of emotional wellness and this truly fit the bill.  Andy explored each of the destructive forces of guilt, anger, greed, and jealousy and how they infiltrate one's life.  At first, I wondered why I had bought the book thinking that I was in control of these emotions.  But, wrong...  buying the book was no coincidence.  As usual, I saw myself in the chapters and vowed to make some changes in my doing and thinking.  So often we look just at the outward actions of a person not at their heart.  Personally, I think character and the true heart of a person is pretty darn important.  I also learned why my blog has been so helpful to move me forward from a past of pain and heartache.  Maybe the Lord was just confirming what I have been thinking.

Usually, if I take more than thirty minutes to get ready to go somewhere, it's about twenty minutes too long.  Today, I decided to take my time showering, doing my  hair, makeup and dressing.  Actually, it was kind of fun.  When I was in Perham, MN last summer, I bought a dress that was rather different.  I figured tonight would be a great opportunity to wear it.  I looked into the mirror and wondered if I wasn't a little on the goth side with my dark purple nails and black "rag" dress but I figured what the heck, I liked the polish and the dress and I figured I would wear both and have fun.  Somehow, I can't ever see me dressing like an old lady ... I like to have fun with my clothes!!

Tonight, Tim, Jane, Katrina, and I went to Benedetto's for dinner.  We went there last time I was here and it became my favorite.  Bob plays oldies on the piano, Bill does magic tricks at the tables for the patrons, and Chef Ben greets each and every diner checking to make sure his dishes are well received.  Of course, the waiters all sang Happy Birthday as I blew out the candle on my carrot cake and I got a chef's hat to wear the rest of the evening.  I left feeling very mellow and "stuffed."

So now that I've rattled on about this and that, what does sixty-five really mean to me?   It's a life passage pure and simple.  There are those who retire with nice pensions, generous social security and intentions of leading the life of Riley.  Since I have no pension, meager Social Security benefits and hate being inactive, my reaching sixty-five has meant keeping on doing what I've been doing for the past years ... doing what I can to survive and enjoy life.

I feel fortunate to be where I am.  My father died at fifty-five before he had a chance to sit back and smell those proverbial roses.  I've thought about him a lot lately.  He had dreams for his golden years ... he worked and worked never realizing that he needed to stop and enjoy each day.  All too soon, life was taken from him and I'm sure he laid in his hospital bed wishing he'd have taken the time to seize life as it unfolded.  I don't know about you, but I've lived many of life's lessons.  What was so important years ago, or even a year ago, isn't as meaningful today.  I don't fear dying; however, I do fear not living life to the fullest.  Today, was one of those "fill 'er up" days!!

"Welcome to Medicare," one of my friends said today.  Yes, now there's Medicare in my life.  But offsetting that is the increased expense of drugs and my lack of earning power to cover costs.  Why does our society believe that, with the blowing out of sixty-five candles, we're suddenly worth only eight bucks an hour as employees or not worth hiring period.  Hogwash!!

I am enjoying the perks of grey hair ... senior discounts at the movies, restaurants ... that kind of thing.  Sixty-five has crept up without warning.  It was quite a jolt to realize my daughters were in their forties and my baby son was in his late thirties.  Naugh....just couldn't be!! 'Fraid so... 

The truth is, most of us are beginning to look like we might be (gulp) Seniors!  That's the tough part.  Personally, I choose to avoid full length mirrors in the bathroom ... The few times I've caught a glimpse of this woman looking back at me, I've thought ... "Holy cow ... no more bathing suits for you!" In my mind, I look great, have solid muscle tone and maintain a flat belly.  At least that's what I see in my mind's eye.  Why that sixty-year-old woman in the mirror let herself go so, I have no idea but she ought to be ashamed!  That just couldn't be moi!

On that note, I will sign off ... Always remember you are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!

Happy Birthday to me..

Happy Birthday to me...

Happy Birthday d-e-a-r meeee....

Happy Birthday to me!

(A note to self & others:  You are your own best friend ... why want to be someone else when who you are is just fine!!)