Family ... dealing with death - Part II

Ready for breakfast? The coffee's hot!

Good Morning from my casa to your casa.  I am up and at 'em early today.  The granite man is coming to remeasure for the counter tops in the kitchen plus I will be getting a stack washer/dryer installed.  What a day!!!

 

Speaking of washers and dryers, I made a trip to the Laundromat this week.  What an experience!  No one was there to explain how much money to put into the washers and dryers and there were no postings.  I've been way too spoiled in life!  I felt really stupid ... a lady washing clothes there took me under her wing and showed me the ropes but not before I put way too many quarters in the dryers!  Oh well!

Chapter 3 of Ecclesiastes tells us that there is a time to live and a time to die...  We understand the living part but the dying remains something that occurs but is not often readily talked about at a deep level.  If you haven't read this book of the Bible, please do so ... it is written by King Solomon who enjoyed power, wealth and access to all of life's pursuits and pleasures.  Life?  What we do before we take our last breath ... too soon, it is too late...  As a Baby Boomer, I would say that my peers would agree with me.

Personally, I think the time to deal with death is while we are still alive.  If we do, we will have no regrets.  I love to look at photos that span the lives of those I love and watch the changes in their appearance, daily comings and goings, and where they reside.  I also enjoy visiting my own past ... believe me, I don't feel like a 64 year old!

 

How do I feel about death?  I am a Christian and when the good Lord says it's time, I am ready.  Being a history lover, I am so anxious to meet those of my family who have gone before me.  I'll probably talk their ears off I'll have so many questions.  I'm just curious about how everyone will look.  How will I recognize them?  I'll bet that I will just know...

 

My Great-Uncle Ern had a woman friend, Helen, who wrote a book called, MY FRIEND ERN.  The stories she relays about his life are amazing.  What a memory this man had!  At the end of the book, Helen talks about Ern's last days ... Let me share her words with you:

 

"One day when Ern was 92, he hurried to my apartment and told me excitedly that the doctor had ordered him to the hospital right away because he had a serious heart condition.

'But, Ern, why aren't you on your way to the hospital?  You could have called me from there!'

'I thought I should tell you!'

'If the doctor ordered you to go at once, you must go at once!'

'I have some things to finish at the house and some papers at the office ... and the car!'

'Ern, please go to the hospital, those things can wait!'

'I better go home and tell my renters.'

'I'll call them."

'No, I'll go home, then I'll go.'

'I'll call your nephew Cloyde!' I warned him, which I did as soon as he had gone.

Cloyde said, 'I'll take care of him.'  And, it's a good thing he did for it took some masterful persuasion to assure Ern he would take care of his papers and put his car in the garage.  And then he still had to help the nurses undress him as Ern was not about to let anyone else undress him -- much less a woman!

I visited him often.  His throat was swelling and he couldn't swallow so he was actually starving.  One frightening day he became rigid, and his color was ashen and he couldn't breathe -- only for a moment, but it seemed long to me.  Then he started breathing again -- his color came back.  He clung very hard to my hand and said, as he had many times when we had experienced something beautiful together -- a gorgeous waterfall, a brilliant sunset -- "They can't take that away from us, can they!'

The next day he died the same way in his nephew's (Gordon) arms.

'My friend Ern, did you ever realize in your quiet way how much pleasure you had given to me and many others?"

What a perfect epitaph ... my only hope is that people will remember me in death in that way for not to truly live and be all God created us to do is a crime!

I wonder what happens to people who never deal with death ... those that think they are bullet proof and will live forever?  To them, there's always tomorrow and those tomorrows never seem to come.  Is it fear of the unknown?  I don't know.  I can only speak for myself and listen to others share their views and experiences.  There are some that lay on their death beds lost and ashamed ... there are others who have lived their lives imperfectly perfect ... the later are the ones I admire!

"Death is not the greatest loss in life.  The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."~~Norman Cousins

Come on and sing this old hymn with me!  There is victory over death ... yes there is!!  Always remember you are loved and prayed for ... YA YOU!!