Stranger on the Shore - Thank You!

    





Stranger on The Shore

Here I stand, watching the tide go out
So all alone and blue
Just dreaming dreams of you

I watched your ship
As it sailed out to sea
Taking all my dreams
And taking all of me

The sighing of the waves
The wailing of the wind
The tears in my eyes burn
Pleading, "My love, return"

Why, oh, why must I go on like this?
Shall I just be a lonely
Stranger on the Shore?

The sighing of the waves
The wailing of the wind
The tears in my eyes burn
Pleading, "My love, return"
Why, oh, why must I go on like this?
Shall I just be a lonely
Stranger on the shore?

Music by Mr. Acker Bilk Words by Robert Mellin

Today, one of my Facebook friends posted the song Stranger on the Shore.  As I listened to the song, a misty fog filled my heart and I traveled back to Summer 1964 when I met a stranger on the shore who sang this song to me...

I was raised on Lake Minnewaska and have always been drawn to the beauty of this lake, it's surroundings and it's many facets.  The lake held such mystery for me...it was a place to think, to dream, to escape.  With graduation from high school behind me, I had decided to spend the Summer on the beach.  I waded in the water, picked up shells and read book after book.  My mother dropped me off after lunch and I spent my afternoons getting brown as a berry and feeling totally free in spirit.  It was one of the most joyous summers of my life.

One afternoon, a man in a burgundy convertible stopped a short distance from me and, books in hand, came down to the shore.  He had an engaging smile, was tall and it wasn't long before we were knee deep in conversation from what we wanted out of life to philosophy to history...different authors and books and how beautiful the lake was.  He challenged me and gifted me with poetry and books...  We played like children running through the trails where the ski jump had been, took rides around the lake and laughed at the silliest of things.  We made sand castles and watched the waves wash them away.  He was a radio announcer and would play different songs for me at night...always at close, he played Stranger on the Shore.  It was a magical Summer and life was good.  I was a Princess being courted by a gentlemanly Prince.

Galen was several years older than me yet we seemed well matched.  His intelligence blew me away.  Sadly, he was more interested in a long term relationship whereas I was enamored by his charm but looked forward to college not a romance.  He seemed to know me better than I knew myself in so many ways.  Sometimes, he would look into my eyes and say things that I didn't understand at the time.  Before I left for college he gave me the book, GIFT FROM THE SEA, by Anne Morrow Lindbergh and said that one day I would know why  he gave it to me.  Yes, now I know.  I've read the book every so many years and and wonder what it would have been like had we remained friends and attended the same college....  He was a good person ... Were the bad tapes playing?  I will never know...  What I do know, is that I knew a special person who sang Stranger on the Shore to me...

When I arrived at college, to the envy of other dorm mates, I had stacks of mail and gifts.  He wanted me to be able to sense his presence as I started my freshman year.  The tapes played loudly and I could not take the relationship to another level other than friends.  With the busyness of school, I soon forgot The Stranger on the Shore.  Sadly, the relationship slowly ended and we went our separate ways.  The Autumn leaves fell and Autumn gave way to Winter.  The next Summer, I attended summer school and my time on the beach took a backseat to Philosophy.  I was dating another young man by that time as well and feeling like a boat tossed on a stormy sea.

Not too long ago, I looked Galen up on the Internet and saw his obituary.  I was absolutely in shock.  Why would a man like Galen have to die so young?  I am now at an age where life can be cut short in a moment's notice...my high school class is dwindling and with each email announcing loss or severe illness, there comes sadness at the loss then joy at remembering that person and who I remembered him/her to be like.   Why is it that life goes by so quickly and gives way to memories of "what if?"  For so long, I feel like I've lived the life of Job.  Now, my days give way to protecting that child inside me that lived with secrets for so long...I protect her when she cries and is hurt.  I give her pep talks and allow her to fly!  I hold out my hand for others to come join me in my quest for wholeness!  I don't want to miss one day of joy!





Thunder Clouds over Lake Minnewaska



This is a photo of thunder clouds over Lake Minnewaska.  I love the photo...the beauty, the deepness of color.  I know it's changed a lot since I was there last and one of my dreams is to go there once again and wade in the water.  The lake is wooing me and calling me ... I know not why.  Maybe it's a way of getting closure to a past mixed with pain and pleasure...trauma and joy.

As I look back on my life, I have so much to say thank you for.  Special people, special times ...  With every layer of trauma and abuse, there has been a layer of good...of innocence...every time I've been in need, God has brought a special person into my life to befriend and mentor me.  Because I knew there was something wrong, I was a willing pupil.  I wanted to know and being a rather type "A" person, I wanted to know RIGHT NOW!!  God doesn't work that way and I've had to develop patience.  I've had to learn to say "no," do the right thing (even if my knees are shaking), and leave the rest to God.  I finally have worth!!

As night closes in, I pray that the Stranger on the Shore who befriended me and made me feel so special knows that he was an important part of a leg on my journey of life... 

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear..."~~John 4:18

Thank you to all of you who have commented on my blogs.  It is my hope that voicing my journey to wholeness will help someone out there.  Just remember, you're worth something and don't let anyone tell you you're not!!  Speak up for yourself -- if you don't love yourself who will?

Until we meet again, look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are one gorgeous woman or one handsome man  - AND MEAN IT!!  I love you, yes YOU!!!

It's Beginning to Look Alot Like Christmas at the Seidlers!

P.S.   Jingle Bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way ... sorry folks, it's the Christmas Lady getting in the mood for a Blessed Christmas!!  Yehaaaaa!